this post was submitted on 25 Feb 2024

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169

Funniest sentence wins (lemmy.world)

submitted 8 months ago by CenturionKing@lemmy.world to c/funny@lemmy.world

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[–] jesusrp98@lemmy.world 150 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Oh no the economy!

[–] hOrni@lemmy.world 18 points 8 months ago

The gas prices will probably go up.

[–] moistclump@lemmy.world 14 points 8 months ago

The shareholders aren’t going to like this.

[–] eguidarelli@lemmy.world 101 points 8 months ago

Houston, you have a problem.

[–] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 59 points 8 months ago

"Starting to think we'll never get Half-Life 3...."

[–] arymandias@feddit.de 58 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

“Why did the earth suddenly teleport ten times closer to the moon.” Then probably something like: “how can an object have sufficient kinetic energy to perfectly perforate the earth but still keep it mostly in tact” also “why is the asteroid burning if it is outside of the atmosphere”. Unless Hans Zimmer was playing in the background, then I would probably say “Dear god!”.

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[–] elbucho@lemmy.world 55 points 8 months ago

Thanks, Obama.

[–] the_beber@lemm.ee 46 points 8 months ago (1 children)

That‘s gonna negatively impact the trout population.

[–] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago

there is definitely a negative correlation between trout numbers and the number of large asteroids that hit the earth

[–] bzarb8ni@lemm.ee 41 points 8 months ago

"NOT THE EARTH!!

That's where I keep all my stuff!"

 - the tick

[–] Annoyed_Crabby@monyet.cc 38 points 8 months ago (1 children)

"MY CABBAGE!"

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[–] neatchee@lemmy.world 36 points 8 months ago (3 children)

"Asphyxiation, hypothermia, starvation, self-harm....Asphyxiation, hypothermia, starvation, self-harm....Asphyxiation, hypothermia, starvation, self-harm............. Dammit this is a difficult choice...."

[–] teft@lemmy.world 9 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Asphyxiation is 10-15 seconds in the vacuum of space. The others are significantly longer.

Just saying.

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[–] Phen@lemmy.eco.br 32 points 8 months ago

Last man standing, bitches.

[–] HELLZBELLY@lemmy.world 32 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Well... shit.

[–] LemmyFeed@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago

Or "well... fuck."

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[–] ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 32 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

At least I brought my towel

[–] janus2@lemmy.zip 25 points 8 months ago

Don't panic.

[–] Jimmycakes@lemmy.world 25 points 8 months ago (1 children)

You don't say anything you just take your helmet off

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[–] crushyerbones@lemmy.world 25 points 8 months ago

Nooo the economy

(Stolen from another meme)

[–] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 24 points 8 months ago

"Well that just happened" - Any Marvel Hero

[–] KISSmyOS@feddit.de 21 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I love it when a plan comes together.

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[–] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 21 points 8 months ago (2 children)

what will

What would.

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[–] Pharmacokinetics@lemmy.world 21 points 8 months ago

This is gonna ruin the economy.

[–] skeeter_dave@sh.itjust.works 20 points 8 months ago (1 children)

At least climate change got solved

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[–] Insig@lemmy.world 20 points 8 months ago

I should have brought my towel...

[–] Immersive_Matthew@sh.itjust.works 20 points 8 months ago

Sweet. Not going to have to face that upcoming election result.

[–] teamevil@lemmy.world 19 points 8 months ago

Shit....that's where I kept all my stuff.

[–] OldWoodFrame@lemm.ee 17 points 8 months ago

Shakira Shakira

[–] bhamlin@lemmy.world 15 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Well, now I don't have to return those videos to Blockbuster.

[–] neatchee@lemmy.world 13 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (4 children)

Blockbuster

.... Who wants to tell 'em?

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[–] Alexstarfire@lemmy.world 15 points 8 months ago

Shit, I forgot to pack potatoes.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 14 points 8 months ago

Oh shit, the economy!

[–] Daxtron2@startrek.website 13 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Need an xkcd to figure out how fast it would be going to plow straight through the whole earth like that.

[–] quantumantics@lemmy.world 16 points 8 months ago (1 children)

https://what-if.xkcd.com/20/ towards the end he covers this sort of scenario in the form of a diamond sphere.

[–] Daxtron2@startrek.website 10 points 8 months ago

I never should've doubted Randall

[–] Dicska@lemmy.world 12 points 8 months ago

"Finally, it was damn fucking time"

[–] lazylion_ca@lemmy.ca 12 points 8 months ago

See Linda, this is why I didn't want to go visit your mother!

[–] Honytawk@lemmy.zip 12 points 8 months ago

AAAAAAAH

as I get pelted by Earths space debris

[–] ItsGhost@sh.itjust.works 12 points 8 months ago

Really simple

“Bollocks”

[–] Tristaniopsis@aussie.zone 11 points 8 months ago

Oh. Fuk.

[–] erie09@lemmy.world 11 points 8 months ago

"Awww, my sunglasses were in there!"

[–] hOrni@lemmy.world 11 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I'm Polish so "Kurwa".

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[–] elbucho@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago

Well, at least I don't have to worry about my student loans anymore.

[–] Vilian@lemmy.ca 10 points 8 months ago

"LMAO fuck you jeremy"

[–] Captain_Buddha@lemmy.world 9 points 8 months ago (1 children)

It's just a little asteroid... it's stil good, it's still good!

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[–] ArmoredThirteen@lemmy.ml 9 points 8 months ago

Huh, that's not ideal

[–] captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 9 points 8 months ago

No words. Just stand there still for a second, then just drop those boxes and remain standing there.

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 8 points 8 months ago

Spaceballs? There goes the planet.

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