Ask Lemmy

Redesign the spine for vertical use. Don't put the eating and breathing tubes on either side of the same flap.

Ability to regrow lost teeth

Body hair is now opt-in

Ability to go to sleep when sleep should be gone to.

RFC, pull request to add git.

Reasoning: Having a built-in versioning system would allow humans to ~~rollback~~ roll back undesirable changes and advancements could be made more easily

please comment or downvote if this is a bad idea

Let's put a cap on how much excess energy the body can store as fat. Sure, some amount is fine and has a number of uses, but just let me poop some excess calories out. I'd only need more if I were to hibernate.

Thinking on it, I want to hibernate too, please.

While we're at it from animals, how about upping some of our regeneration? Teeth don't regrow? Naw, constant regen please. I get too big of a cut and I get a scar? Let's let everything regrow from being lost if you can survive without it. Also why doesn't the brain heal? Most important part of the body and each crack's there for life. Let me get my serotonin back already, slacker.

Also what's with this getting assigned a gender thing? You don't even get to know what it means before you have one! And then we build society as if this coin flip was the seed to the tree of life. Let people choose and switch naturally, please and thank you.

Just one universal blood type please

Hair and nails not constantly growing

Your body not over reacting to things (allergies and auto immune)

No more biting down on my tongue or cheeks when eating. Most annoying glitch ever.

• Separate holes for eating and breathing
• Separate sewage system from entertainment complex
• Remove mental health disorders
• Improved empathy

The spine

FIX THE SPINE

Being able to shoot lasers from my tits would be cool.

The breathing hole and the eating hole are separated

No more cancer please.

We should not get our adult teeth at 7 then no more ever. We need at least one more set.

I don't think balding is useful, agree that could go.

Fertility should be manageable without using all the devices, hormones, etc. Like it should be a positive choice not a default state we have to harm ourselves to avoid. And I don't think we need menopause either. Just turn on fertility only to get pregnant.

(ETA- I also think sexually transmitted diseases should not exist at all, they seem like religious fundamentalist biological warfare, but not sure what change in a human body could accomplish this and leave the pleasure intact. )

Add more holes to the body.

Kidney stones, gallstones, whatever the fuck the body does of "Lets build a rock inside the body that can fuck us up" needs to stop.

Fix our spine and knees

(+) baby pouch, like marsupials'
(+) limbs regrowth capacity, like salamanders'

Manual/deliberate sperm/egg production.

Manual/deliberate control over fat creation and storage.

Better foreign body-own body recognition by immune system. No more auto-immune, no allergies, MS, Lupus.

Appetite is 100% linked to calories needed. You still enjoy food, but the moment you swallow enough calories for whatever you did since the last time you ate, you have zero appetite and anything put in front of you loses all appeal.

Terrible for survival situations, great for modern life where an abundance of food is a bigger problem than a scarcity.

The ability not to pee myself every time I sneeze, run or jump after giving birth vaginally would be pretty nice. Even without doing any physical therapy.

I have one: ingrown nails and nail infections can go fuck themselves.

I have had FIVE consecutive toe infections in the last 18 months or so. I'm so done with it lol.

But on a broader scale, some people die or lose limbs from stuff like this, so it'd be nice if that didn't happen anymore.

Micro-organisms taking a shit on our teeth doesn't cause cavities.

No more accidentally biting my tongue or the inside of my cheek while eating. Sometimes I'm just excited for some good food and it just gets completely ruined :(

Definetly periods, stupid design and incredibly rare in mamals anyway.

Also, a change of our metabolism, our current way to deal with excess energy is outdated. And maybe make us resistant to cancers, that shit sucks.

A lot of great ideas here, but also sinus are such a terrible design. Please no more sinuses.

Appendix not coming from the factory is a big one. A slightly better immune system that can get through the blood/brain barrier and kill rabies/amoebas, and other brain infections like TB (without shredding brain tissue) too. If a virus like rabies gets past that barrier, you are 1 0 0 % B O N E D as your immune system is largely locked out.

Wider uterus/vagina too. Human babies have massive heads that don't fit through too well. It's like an orange on a toothpick. Making a smaller baby could be a possibility, but survivability would potentially go down.

For very tall people: a larger and stronger heart organ. A second one acting like a smaller turbo would also help. Heh. Failover cluster hearts. You'd probably have to have stronger veins and tissues as a result though.

No more fucking hemorrhoids!

I don't care about balding (and I have been since 20s). Just a healthy body reset every decade or two/whenever necessary. Get the metabolic rate up, clean up all the junk from the environment that has polluted the DNA and reduced the telomere lengths (whatever the correlation/causation there). Just a "take the body to the shop" type of repair possible. A chance to live for centuries.

Body hair should have multiple sliders like a video game avatar. Wanna be furry all over like a Persian cat or a poodle? No problem. Want to be smooth as a dolphin? Also no problem.

shoulder-mounted laser guns

Ability to regrow lost teeth and no more wisdom teeth.

being a hermaphrodite would be pretty dope

Pelvises that can accommodate both upright walking AND the size of human brains without, you know, killing the humans during birth.