Ah, a healthy gut fauna
this post was submitted on 11 Oct 2024
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A great adventure is waiting for you ahead. Hurry onward Ladybug, or you will soon be dead. The journey before you may be long and filled with woe. But you must escape the gay man's ass, or your tale can't be told.
Ladybug, Ladybug, Ladybug, Ladybug!
Ladybug's journey is distant, far and vast! To find his way out of a gay man's ass! The road ahead is filled with danger and fright! But push onward Ladybug with all of your might!
The Sparrow Prince lies somewhere way up ahead! Don't look back Ladybug, or you will soon be dead! Ladybug, Ladybug, the time is growing late. Slow down now, and seal your fate.
Take the magic helmet-torch to help you light the way, there's still a lot of ground to cross inside the man so gay! Ahead of you lies adventure, and your strength still lies within! Freedom from the ass of doom is the treasure you will win!
Ladybug came to the stomach dark.... Near the depths of the lungs and heart...
Catatafish of the stomach's cove!
Catatafish's riddle will soon be told!
Ladybug has made it out, his tale is nearly through!
Now that you're the beetle king has more adventures to go on! Fly away to faraway lands and to the setting sun! So many enemies and battles yet to fight! For Ladybug the Beetle King's tale is told throughout the night!
Lay-Lay-Ladybug Ladybug Lady-Ladybug Ladybug, Laid-lay-Ladybug, Beetle King.
Is this from South Park?
(Cue the Capt America I get that reference gif)
In the episode, "The Death Camp of Tolerance", Mr. Garrison inserts Lemmiwinks into Mr. Slave's anus with the hope that he'll get fired. Lemmiwinks then travels through Mr. Slave's digestive system to reach freedom.
Episode s06e14
Lemmiwinks is our mascot.
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Yis
That looks like more like an Asian Beetle than a typical Lady Bug. Those bastards will crawl into any crack or crevice they can squeeze themselves into to find a place to over-winter. They're annoying, they smell like gross musty shit, and they will bite you given the opportunity.
So while this is the first time I've seen one in someone's colon, I'm not completely shocked either. In fact, it's kind of "on brand".
Now you know why they smell like gross musty shit
That is one hardy mofo.
Before any sort of colonoscopy, they give you a days worth of liquid laxatives that you need to drink and you will spend the better part of the day before your procedure shitting what feels like a grown man worth of shit.
Only then will the colon look as clean as it does in the picture.
That damn bug survived all that. Either that or he climbed in a nice clean colon after all the shit was evacuated.
Recent colonoscopy here, can confirm the "grown man worth of shit" estimation
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Buddy didn't sleep tight enough
not enough flared bases
(⁀ᗢ⁀)
Now we just need to know how many of these crawl up our bums like the amount of spiders we allegedly eat per year.
don't ask about ladybug georg
Please let this be a normal field trip
At my old school we never entered someone's rectum without consent.
How did it get there?
Pretty sure it didn’t survive a trip through stomach acid.
Did you ever find a bug on a vegetable in the market?
🤔
Granted, I think a human stomach is more difficult to traverse than a frog, and it's more likely that it came in the back door. I'm just not willing to rule it out.
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My best guess is that it was on some of the equipment and somehow got transferred in during the colonoscopy.
Here is a link with more information if anyone is curious: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6791639/
The proposed theory is the preparations the patient made for the colonoscopy may have allowed the ladybug to survive the digestive system.
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Did they give Lindsay Graham a colonoscopy?
Oh dude just fuck you for adding this to the universe.
Please explain, I'd like my daily dose of trauma
The story goes that during the RNC, gay prostitutes are in high demand. There is one such guy who claims to have serviced Lindsay Graham's anus and said that it was peppered with raised moles, which Graham lovingly refered to as his "little ladybugs".
Allegedly.
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I got spiders living in mine. Keeps the bugs out.
🎵He anally inserted a spider to eat the fly; I don't know why he inserted the fly; perhaps he'll die🎵
I think they mean "gastroentomology".
Tee hee hee.
...that's some clever gastroetymology...
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"Geez, Allen. You got a bug up your butt or what?"
If that ladybug makes it out, it’ll have one hell of a story to share with its fellow bugs.
Sounds like a great writing prompt actually.
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Truly a shitpost.
Gastroenterology FTFY
No sorry this is gastro-entomology.
This conversation is gastro-etymology, BTW.
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I remember this level from The Fractured But Whole.
Save Him.
Don’t er have like digestive juices and bacteria to kill stuff exactly like this?
James and the Giant Peach 2, Ladybug's Revenge.
This was a pretty great thread, y'all are fantastic.
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