There are two ways to build community - one is doing it from scratch, and one is finding a community and joining it. So, start with what’s easy. Are there existing communities of people you could join, based on your interests? (For example: churches, book clubs, bands, athletic groups, etc?) Since you’re a plant nerd like me, check out nonprofits that need volunteers for gardening or landscaping. Check Meetup, check local event calendars, ask your friends what they’re up to, and invite yourself along.
Building community from scratch takes time, but it can be done. It starts with introducing yourself to your neighbors. Does anyone pass by when you’re in the garden? Maybe the same person walking their dog every day? Stop and say hi to them. Learn their names. Ask for their contact info. The more time you spend outside, the more you are going to see neighbors you can “bump into.”
Once you have their contact info, email or text them when you need something, or there is a cool event. You can be cliche; ask for a cup of sugar and make small talk. Or bring cookies to that reclusive neighbor you’re never met. Here are some emails I’ve gotten from my neighbors this week: a pizza school fundraiser; a car was broken into; beach pictures from a past neighbor who moved to Oregon in 2023; someone has extra plant starts; a new restaurant just opened.
You also have to be the person that introduces your neighbors to each other - “have you met X yet?” or “do you know who lives over at 123?” Invite them over. Have a neighborhood happy hour, outside, in the street - other neighbors will come out and you can meet them too, get their contact info, and make sure they get added to the list for the next one.
I live on an extraordinary block with amazing neighbors - we watch each others’ pets, water each others’ plants, have regular outdoor happy hours, have an annual block party, go out to bars/shows/meals with each other, have craft nights, etc. They are now some of my closest friends! But it took years (and COVID stir-craziness) to get to this point. It isn’t a fast process, but now we have a real, solid community. We are ages 37-77 and I think at least 3 of them have my house keys, lol.
I hope this helps! Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there. A LOT of people are craving connection right now so even when it feels clunky, it’s working.
In a word: orientalism. This art movement was predicated on the exoticism and “othering” of subject matter and the bystanders serve as a proxy for the audience of the art itself.