this post was submitted on 01 Dec 2023
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Since a lot of women have started to call their female friends "girlfriends", I have to wonder how women with actual girlfriends have been dealing with this lol

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[–] bionicjoey@lemmy.ca 86 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I'm neither a lesbian nor a woman but the word "partner" is pretty universally understood.

[–] theKalash@feddit.ch 48 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Unless they work as a policewoman.

[–] Peppycito@sh.itjust.works 8 points 9 months ago (2 children)

They could also be in business together. Or cowboys.

[–] Send_me_nude_girls@feddit.de 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Then add "...at work" in the same breath. Guys, we don't need to reinvent language.

[–] Peppycito@sh.itjust.works 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

How do you differentiate cowboys?

[–] weew@lemmy.ca 1 points 9 months ago

avoid saying "howdy"

[–] betahack@lemmy.world 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

if cowboys i believes it's pahtnah, in the parlance of the day

[–] Peppycito@sh.itjust.works 2 points 9 months ago

I hear it Sam Elliot's voice "Pard-ner"

[–] catsup@lemmy.one 6 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Yeah I thought about that one too, but it feels too broad of a term. Partner could be used to refer to a work colleague. And I'd feel really tempted to add "in crime" at the end lol

[–] Peppycito@sh.itjust.works 2 points 9 months ago

I'm always tempted to preceed it with "howdy"

[–] awnery@lemmy.world 1 points 9 months ago

work on a cook line in a restaurant. gain a little trust, might get a partner or several.

[–] OutlierBlue@lemmy.ca 79 points 9 months ago (3 children)

"This is Jane, we're fucking."

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee 15 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Someone once introduced their gf literally saying "We are in a relationship" - it's sounds awkward/clunky but I didn't even notice that, it didn't make me think for a moment, its precise, short, and above all clear. I appreciate direct communication way more than 'what sounds nice'.

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 2 points 9 months ago

You lika de clear communication eh?

[–] 0x4E4F@infosec.pub 2 points 9 months ago

Can't get nore direct than that 🤣🤣🤣.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world -2 points 9 months ago

"Fucking" is pounding penis into vagina, so I don't think that's something lesbians do.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 33 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

“This is my wife” works real well

For my girlfriend, I mostly just correct people if they’re mistaken. “Oh we’re more than just friends” type statements.

Also fuck is the platonic use of girlfriend back? Dammit

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 8 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Yeah, hate to break it to you, but it isn't even just women/girls using it for platonic friends. Men/boys are too.

Not too surprisingly, that hasn't happened with boyfriend that I've run across. Which is kinda fucked up when you consider what the difference in usage represents.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 7 points 9 months ago

My grandma talks like that but in my area in my generation it’s generally understood that [gender]friend is romantic and friend isn’t. If gender is relevant it’s “the [genders]”

That terminology is incredibly frustrating as a lesbian. Especially since it’s regularly used alongside calling my wife my friend despite me repeatedly referring to her as my wife

[–] mnemonicmonkeys@sh.itjust.works 1 points 9 months ago

Personally I've only ever heard "platonic boyfriends" when it was platonic

[–] 0x4E4F@infosec.pub -3 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Hm... so she calls you her wife as well, correct 🤔?

[–] papalonian@lemmy.world 12 points 9 months ago (5 children)

What else would she call her..?

[–] webadict@lemmy.world 12 points 9 months ago
[–] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 9 months ago

Ghost busters!

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 6 points 9 months ago
[–] Nemo@midwest.social 5 points 9 months ago
[–] CyberTaco@lemmy.world 5 points 9 months ago
[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Our government even calls us wives

[–] 0x4E4F@infosec.pub -1 points 9 months ago

IDK, just asking 🤷.

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 26 points 9 months ago (1 children)

“This person is my lover Karen”

Just introduce them as your partner. Lesbians are so habitually entrenched in hiding their sexuality.

I have so many pairs of “friends” come in appliance shopping. Gay men come in, it’s “This is my husband Mike”. Gay women come in and it’s like “This is my friend Paula. She helps me pick out appliances and definitely doesn’t live with me”.

I don’t pry, because I’m just selling appliances. But it’s pretty obvious.

[–] Lennnny@lemmy.world 6 points 9 months ago

Robert Dyas?

[–] mom@nom.mom 20 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Since a lot of women have started to call their female friends "girlfriends"

This isn't really a new thing, though... Is it? Or did I miss the era where we didn't use "girlfriend" - at least sometimes - when talking about a female friend?

[–] smort@lemmy.world 13 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Yeah my 70 yo aunt has had platonic “girlfriends” for at least 30 years

[–] catsup@lemmy.one 3 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Oh damn, I thought it was a more recent thing

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 4 points 9 months ago

I can tell you’re young because 30 years doesn’t seem recent to you.

When I hear of a 70-year-old woman who’s been doing something for the last 30 years, I read that as a recent cultural change happened.

[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 19 points 9 months ago

Since a lot of women have started to call their female friends “girlfriends

That was the original meaning of the word before it ever had romantic connotations.

From Wikipedia...

According to the Oxford English Dictionary, the earliest meaning of the word "girlfriend", from 1859 on, was to designate "a female friend; esp. a woman's close female friend". In the late 1800s, it took on the meaning of "A female with whom a person has a romantic or sexual relationship".

[–] fhek@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 9 months ago (1 children)

The new way of referring to your SO is “partner”.

So I guess like that?

[–] BellaDonna@mujico.org 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

This, I still use girlfriend interchangeably for both and it absolutely creates confusion.

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 1 points 9 months ago

But I thought that was your car

[–] awnery@lemmy.world 9 points 9 months ago

partner is a brilliant word about to made meaningless, apparently, so, love you all, friends, buddies, girlies, girlfriends, boyfriends, beards, compatriots and fellow travelers, fuck i''m old I forgot a few dozen thousand.

share love

[–] RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I'm not a lesbian, but I'd probably just say girlfriend and expect people to be able to understand context.

[–] weew@lemmy.ca 4 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I don't know if it's just a local slang, but most straight girls I know will refer to their close female friends as girlfriends.

[–] Witchfire@lemmy.world 2 points 9 months ago

That's almost strictly a straight girl thing. When all your friends are queer or queer-adjacent, it's usually understood what you mean.

[–] RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world 1 points 9 months ago

Yes. Hence context.

[–] Franzia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 9 months ago
[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 1 points 9 months ago

Tell everyone that we livk each other's clits three times a day and show them our promise rings.