this post was submitted on 31 Oct 2024
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[–] ekZepp@lemmy.world 8 points 46 minutes ago
[–] SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world 5 points 42 minutes ago* (last edited 36 minutes ago) (1 children)

Since 2008 Ganesha only lost two times. I guess Jesus is past his prime. And the first loss wasn’t really a loss, since it was 8 first place winners with 7 kids of South Asian descent.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Scripps_National_Spelling_Bee_champions

[–] Paradachshund@lemmy.today 3 points 22 minutes ago

I mean look at him! Jesus doesn't seem like he has much of a shot against that beast of a deity.

[–] Tyfud@lemmy.world 5 points 1 hour ago

Now do it for two Christians.

[–] tourist@lemmy.world 33 points 2 hours ago (4 children)

why jesus cakes hanging out

Also my money on the four armed elephant dude with an axe

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 5 points 30 minutes ago

Dude forgot to gird. Rookie mistake.

[–] finitebanjo@lemmy.world 2 points 34 minutes ago* (last edited 33 minutes ago) (1 children)

If we consider the Sistine Chapel's depiction of the realm of heaven to be divine inspiration, the clothes were added later after some complaints.

The whole concept of original sin is such that pure beings such as Adam and Eve did not even realize that they were naked until they ate the fruit of carnal knowledge.

Therefor it is canon that God likes to hang out with his wang out. Freeballin.

[–] pinkystew@reddthat.com 0 points 30 minutes ago (1 children)

Also Jesus was a bottom

Do you think he was topping 12 dudes a night? They started a religion after him because he was nice not because he was a multiple cummer

So it totally makes sense for him to be flying cakes in a fight with a Hindu god

[–] finitebanjo@lemmy.world 3 points 28 minutes ago

I'm not sure what your religion is but I regret to inform you that you're not going to the good place.

[–] Buffalox@lemmy.world 10 points 2 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago) (1 children)

Yes it looks like an iron axe, and God has a problem with Iron:
https://biblehub.com/judges/1-19.htm

Judges 1:19

The LORD was with the men of Judah. They took possession of the hill country, but they were unable to drive the people from the plains, because they had chariots fitted with iron.

So the idea that God is almighty is pretty ridiculous, according to the Bible that is.

[–] tourist@lemmy.world 2 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

I never actually read much of the thing

I just assert that the burning bush was absolutely cannabis sativa, despite any solid evidence to the contrary. I don't care that it's not native to the region or whatever.

Anyways, why the fuck was he driving people out of the plains? Homies were just chilling in their iron chariots.

[–] Fermion@feddit.nl 1 points 5 minutes ago

I can't claim to have much experience in the matter, but I don't think people who just chill generally have chariots fitted with iron. Like if your neighbor happened to have a tank and a bunker, would you say they're just chilling?

[–] lowleveldata@lemmy.world 8 points 2 hours ago

No pants for serious mode

[–] ThePantser@lemmy.world 25 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago) (2 children)

Also relevant, two people of the same religion praying for the same thing. The god fights themselves. Or flips a coin, free will remember.

[–] argh_another_username@lemmy.ca 16 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

Jim Carrey comes to mind in Bruce Almighty, when he starts to say yes to every prayer and thousands win the lottery.

[–] superduperpirate@lemmy.world 4 points 2 hours ago (2 children)

Don’t they each win like ten cents or something?

[–] einkorn@feddit.org 5 points 1 hour ago

Yes and it starts a riot.

[–] BanjoShepard@lemmy.world 5 points 2 hours ago

I thought the god chose the person who had suffered more of the gods torture.

[–] Gingerlegs@lemmy.world 5 points 2 hours ago
[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 10 points 2 hours ago

I'd buy that Street Fighter DLC pack.

[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 4 points 1 hour ago

I would love for Marvel to make this movie.

I mean, the MCU is pretty clearly burnt out, and I wouldn't trust DC to make a movie worth watching.

[–] BaroqueInMind@lemmy.one 2 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

There's no fucking way a human zombie pacifist Jew would be able to take on a 2-ton humanoid elephant god with six arms and wields weapons 1 v 1.