DurbanPoison

joined 2 weeks ago
[–] DurbanPoison@feddit.nl 1 points 12 hours ago

Nice try

The real biden, being the oldest boomer of all boomers, would have phone called me

Was dealing with a rental agent without a pfp, tried to guess his age with a message, see if he'd type "......." or asked "are you black", but that first fucking phone call confirmed it. YES WOUTER I SAID WILL SEE YOU IN 30-40 MINUTES. IT HAS ONLY BEEN 18 MINUTES.

like, I can't talk on the phone while driving. I could die. Someone else could die. I could get my phone confiscated in the Municipality of the City of Cape Town.

I know that's not a problem for you, You just use the phone to WhatsApp hour long voicenotes to your ex-wife who blocked you and Chrome search "big bobs oily sex party"

My fucking OTPs, my bank, my job and my literal lifeline. I wish I didn't need an app for any of that shit but our generations do

[–] DurbanPoison@feddit.nl 1 points 23 hours ago

That's a very good point and I 100% agree with you.

Although you get what I was trying to say. More about the power dynamics.

Looking at the job market now, I've got a liter of arsehole-safe bleach and a camera config setup just in case of the 0.000000001% chance my boss requires a certain image.

[–] DurbanPoison@feddit.nl 2 points 2 days ago

They all called me a slur. The worst one.

Do they have oil

[–] DurbanPoison@feddit.nl 9 points 2 days ago

Is this a face-to-genitals matching game

[–] DurbanPoison@feddit.nl 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I need to know

Why was the penis inspection necessary

[–] DurbanPoison@feddit.nl 15 points 2 days ago (3 children)

https://es.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sejong_City

I got no clue man I'm high as fuck

Looks like they tried to make it the new Capital but they made a huge bunch of fuck-ups

I don't know the direct connection to birth rates. Not sure what happened but I tapped something on accident and can't read whatever most of the article says now.

[–] DurbanPoison@feddit.nl 6 points 3 days ago

My brother used to take Ambien

Like, too much Ambien. I heard that in the USA, you could only get 3-5 tablets or something like that prescribed. Over here in ZA, you can get a 6 month prescription with 30 tablets each repeat.

We shared a bathroom. On multiple occasions I'd walk in with the floor coated in piss. One time, I walked in while he was lying face down, dick out, on the floor completely soaked in urine.

I helped him up, he said something incompressible and tried to get him a fresh pair of clothes.

Another time he woke me up to convince me he could make things levitate. I said "nah man you're on Ambien, go to bed", but he kept insisting. Eventually I just caved so I could go back to sleep and watch him unsuccessfully levitate his keyboard.

I played cod once after taking 10mg. I felt like I was in the fucking jungle. Heart pounding, terrified, adrenaline flowing, tunnel vision. Fucking dominated that match though.

I then blacked out and I told someone who I haven't spoken to in years, that I was in love with them. (I wasn't). Deleted the message when I woke up. No follow ups, thank god.

The memories are either blackout or vaguely choppy.

Weird-ass drug. Wouldn't recommend unless you really struggle to fall asleep. You gotta take the pill and immediately jump into bed and try to fall asleep or else face the consequences of shit you don't remember doing.

[–] DurbanPoison@feddit.nl 18 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Remember to do that before pissing on it

[–] DurbanPoison@feddit.nl 31 points 3 days ago (6 children)

Even if it turns out he truly had no fucking idea about the slaves and was completely oblivious to the illegal pornography framed on the monster's walls, he still did a bunch of fucked up shit

The first thing that comes to mind for most people is Monica Lewinsky. If the most powerful man in the world asks you to do something you are not comfortable with, can you truly say no?

Even if you're not American, if Biden asks me to bleach my asshole and send him a photo, I'd do it, because I don't want the CIA to kill my dogs with mystery gas or somehow Pegasus my 20 year old microwave.

[–] DurbanPoison@feddit.nl 12 points 6 days ago

That smoke is white phosphorus

[–] DurbanPoison@feddit.nl 10 points 1 week ago

The assisted exit game without saving provided is not great. From what I understand, it paralyzes you and makes it feel like every part of your body is on fire until your heart eventually stops pumping blood.

I may be misremembering, but I think it also takes a really long time. 30 minutes or something of pure agony.

No one deserves that. Especially not this dude. First time offender, substantial public support, very unlikely to reoffend. They're trying to make an example out of him. Don't you dare hurt the shareholders.

Long story short, I can't openly advocate for a better solution to assisted grave digger revenue, but lethal injection is one I'd strongly advise against.

Also, I have a similar problem with back pain. Not as drastic as his, but when it hits, my god, I can't walk, sometimes it reaches the back of the neck, makes it feel like the back of my head is repeatedly being stabbed. My insurance paid for physiotherapy, but it still flares up now and then.

[–] DurbanPoison@feddit.nl 11 points 1 week ago

"Please don't kill me"

"Stop being antisemitic"

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