this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2023
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Am I the Asshole?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/lionprincesslioness on 2023-08-11 21:24:12.


My boyfriend (40m), myself, and 3 other friends went out for dinner a few days ago for some burgers and alcohol. We had a great time, service was great, and the experience was very enjoyable. It was time for us to pay our bills. All of us paid separate checks.

When we were all getting our credit cards out to pay, I said out loud to everybody just simply as a conversation "Make sure to tip our waitress! She was amazing! Don't be that type of person who doesn't tip. Come on, guys!" Not going to lie, I gave my boyfriend a blank stare when I said that.

My boyfriend never tips. He is one of those people where he only wants to pay what is on the bill. No more. No less. I have had conversations in the past with him explaining to him on the etiquette of tipping your waitress since they only make $1.37 an hour where we live and they literally rely on tips, but he does not care.

Anyways, back to the restaurant. None of our friends caught I was looking at my boyfriend because they were all focused on grabbing their credit cards and they simply did not know that he is not a tipper. As usual, my boyfriend did not tip the waitress, but myself and everybody else did.

We said good-bye to our friends and went home. My boyfriend and I took the same car home. He brought up the situation to me in the car. He said "I knew you were singling me out at the restaurant when you brought up the tipping topic. I saw that look you gave me." I apologized immediately since he did not sound very thrilled based off the tone of his voice.

I expressed my concern, once again, on how I felt about him never tipping. As usual, he tells me how he literally does not care about tipping and never will anytime soon. The topic changed from there.

I've been thinking about this situation all week. AITA for this or do you think ESH?

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[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 1 points 1 year ago

So wait, you passive-aggressively sniped your bf for doing something you don't like, walked it back and are now asking the internet for advice?