Asklemmy

Teletubbyzurückwinker.

Someone that waves back at the Teletubbies.

Swedish Skitstövel - shit boot, basically means asshole

Not that it’s untranslatable, but I enjoy it quite a lot.

Поцілуй бузька в калатало - go kiss a stork on the knocker.

If you ever heard storks, you’ll recognize the dismissiveness of this statement.

My favorite has to be zkundyksicht, it comes from "z kundy ksicht" which literally means "a face [that came] from a cunt". "Z" = from, "kunda" = cunt, "ksicht" = a rude way to say face.

Heard one: Your mother has a penis and your father is jealous of it.

"I piss in your mother's death"

Alternatively, "May Stalin fuck you"

And yes, I live in Eastern Europe.

Triangeljosti.

The Jostiband is a Dutch orchestra for people with a developmental disability, mainly people with down syndrome.

A [triangle](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Triangle_(musical_instrument)) , or triangel in Dutch, is possibly the simplest instrument you can think of.

So calling someone a ‘triangeljosti’ is basically comparing them to someone who plays the simplest possible instrument in a band for developmentally disabled people.

In Quebec French, people sometimes say of someone who's not particularly bright:

"His mom rocked him/her too close to the wall."

It's just so... vivid and random.

Gea mor net af die Kondl. "Don't step on my milk jug". You're annoying me and you better shut up or go away.

Konnsch mor in Buggl oirutschn. "You can slide down my back". I don't give a fuck.

German dialect from Tyrol.

Salame

Yes that's right, it means salami and in spanish it's used to call someone an idiot. Soft insult, but I use it, and saying so and so is a salami in english would only get me weird looks.

Yiddish is not my native language but I think this one is so good it absolutely deserves a mention:

All of your teeth shall fall out except one that gives you a massive toothache.

Portuguese is full of these, but how about vai pra casa do caralho.

Which roughly translates to "go to the dick's home", basically another way of saying "go fuck yourself", but even more vulgar somehow.

"Te falta una patata para el kilo" (in Spanish)

English: "You're missing one potato for the kilo."

When you want to call someone a fool or an idiot, you question if they're in their right mind, if they use their head before speaking or doing something.

German: "Dich soll der Blitz beim Scheißen treffen" - Lightning shall strike you while you're taking a shit

Best insult ever, imo.

كول هوا

"Kawl hawa"

Literally "eat air" in Arabic

Means shut up

In polish, calling people with the neutral gender. It's a grave insult which implies lack of agency and dehumanisation, and thank to some rightwinger assholes in parliament is also a specific transphobic insult now.

While in english it's completely normal thing to say if you're not sure of a person's gender.

So definitely not my "favourite", i would never said this to anyone in polish and i occasionally get a hiccup of misgendering someone in english because of that, but interesting from language point of view.

"Spargeltarzan", which is German for "asparagus Tarzan". Basically someone who is physically weak, but tall and lanky.

I also like "Lauch", which just translates to "leek", the veggie. Oh, and "Bohnenstange", which means bean stalk. We do seem to have quite a few vegetable-related insults in German, now that I think of it...