Asklemmy

Your parents getting divorced and you should tell your parents to get you diagnosed for autism. Especially since we used to be mute when we were younger and we were also in special ed and rode the short bus.

1. you're right about all the contradictions in the Bible
2. drop everything and immediately begin learning Java and Python. if you get good enough you can skip college entirely and save years of emotional hell
3. convince mom to let you quit the instruments you hate playing and do computer extracurriculars instead
4. buy bitcoin sell in Nov '21 lol (or just invent it)
5. learn Mandarin Chinese, not Japanese. also maybe chill w/ the weeb shit
6. move to NYC as soon as you can and DO NOT LEAVE even if there's a scary pandemic because you won't be able to afford to move back and you'll miss it real bad :(
7. BUY AN EARTHBOUND CARTRIDGE BEFORE THEY BECOME UNOBTAINABLY EXPENSIVE 😭

God isn't real

Buy Bitcoin ASAP and have a prepping plan

Your family doesn't care for you

Be less Christian to be more Christ-Like.

Being gay is not something you're stuck with, it's who you are and you have every right to celebrate it.

You're very clever. Don't use your cleverness to manipulate or do harm.

You will find love.

ACAB

Dad dies when you're 23. Mom is mentally ill, don't ruin yourself trying to save her. Buy bitcoin!

Defend yourself. If he tries to touch you, make a fuss. Also, you're gay.

TW child abuse

Both your mum and dad are using you to hurt each other. The stuff they tell you, the way they hit you and scream at you, all that is wrong. It's not your fault, and I love you because despite all the evil they unleashed on you, you grow up to be a sensitive, caring, loving human being.

You have autism. You are not broken, or lazy. You spend your time daydreaming because the real world is incredibly shitty to you. Next time you see a doctor, ask them to speak to them alone, and ask them to get you the help you need.

None of those children are your friends. They're nasty bullies and you don't need their approval.

Your life gets better. Find this girl in America and be her penpal. Meet up, she's your soulmate. Tell her everything you know to help her heal, and she'll help you in return.

Memorize these dates and use them to make fucktons of money. Use your billions to plant trees. Plant as many trees as possible, as early as possible.

See you in 40 years. Sincerely, you.

Edited to add:

This is a hug, your parents never hug you and you need to be comforted. They've never told you they love you, and that's incredibly important to do every day.

It's ok to cry, don't shut that part of you off to stop the bullying.

Don't get on a motorcycle like your dad wants, you don't have good hand eye coordination or good eyesight, and the accident you get into leads to lifelong chronic pain.

You are not ugly, and it's ok to be weird! Celebrate your uniqueness!

Instead of sitting outside a locked house for hours after school, go to the library and read, you're allowed to do that.

That teacher is a pervert, don't be their friend just because they talk to you.

Spend more time with your aunts and grandmother, they love you and can help you feel normal.

Your mum lies to you about a lot of stuff, she's very damaged and taking it out on you because you arrived a month after her 16th birthday. She was r***d by your dad and made to stay with him, none of that is your fault or burden to bear.

Your brother is an annoying little shit, just walk away from him. He grows up into a nasty fascistic asshole who blames everyone else for his failures. Including you. Do not ever get involved with anything he does, especially to do with computers

You have way too much put on you for such a young person. Read these books for ways to withstand it all. I wish I could travel back in time and adopt you.

Your dad is a piece of shit. Find a mentor before your too old and you have to figure it all out by yourself.

Programming is really not as hard as it looks to start, just don't start with C++ for the love of god lmao

Appreciate your brother. You've only got a few more years with him.

"You are not responsible; you were loved and wanted. Don't lower your head. Dare to speak your mind. Don't be afraid to tell others what you go through. You are going to be a bigger person than you expect."

Please don't let your dad marry that cunt who'll become your absolute doom in the future. She may seem nice and warm but it's a fucking facade. She's a fucking cunt and they will destroy every inch of happiness you have.

The things she says will confuse and frustrate you. She will pretend to love and care for you. She will abuse you. She will hurt you. She will threaten you and manipulate you. She will try to make you believe it's your fault. She will make you question whether you really experienced the things that happened to you. She will lean on you. She will expect and even demand things of you that no mother should ask of their child.

Go and build a network of support. Look at how other kids behave with their families. Yours is not normal or healthy. You are not a checked box on somebody's list. You are not a trophy to be paraded around. You are not her friend or her therapist. You are not a dog to be whipped into obedience. You are your own person. She will never give you the stability you need or the love you deserve.

There will be times that you will not feel safe. You will get out. You'll find friends who will shelter you, couches to sleep on. They see your pain. They understand. It will be okay. It does get better. I love you, and you will learn to love yourself.

And hey, it's not all doom and gloom, yeah? The games are so fucking good. Like there's a lot of trash but there's story and writing in some of these that's so profound and it brings you so much joy. I know it'll be hard to believe at times, but it's worth sticking around.

You think being a Jehovah's Witness is bad? Pro tip, move in with dad but don't be his friend. Don't fall for any kind of "modeling" scam he pulls on you.

1. Do not let Mom ever have brain surgery.
2. Make grandma see a different doctor. The current one is clueless.
3. Bust Dad for smoking in secret and force him to stop. You know how it can be done.
4. Idea of Mom and Dad getting a divorce is a scary one, but it probably would make their and your life a lot better.
5. Start jogging daily. You'll never like it, but you need to do it to.
6. Ask her out when you're 15. She likes you too.
7. Start taking guitar and piano lessons. Turns out you have musical talent, you just haven't realized it yet.
8. No, I won't tell you how to get rich. You'd fuck your life up royally with unlimited money.

Don't smoke cigarettes ever.

Slow down at that blind corner in October 1989.

Don't take the shortcut to downtown in July 1994.

Don't lift that giant tube tv by yourself in May 2005.

Never stop exercising, playing guitar, writing, and painting/multimedia art.

You're gonna end up almost dying at around... 16 yrs? Do not go through that target training course.

Oh, and you're Ace & Genderfluid, have fun!

You're gonna be the happiest you've ever been, but it's going take another 30 years and a failed marriage to get there. Hang tough - it's worth it!

Your life isn't going to be "normal" and it's not your fault. You are going to be different and it's not because you are better or worse. just different. Just do your best and that's all anyone can want from you.

You're not lazy, you're not stupid, and you're not a loser. You just have ADHD, and once you figure that out things will get much, much easier. Hang in there.

Next year will be the hardest year you've ever had, don't let it turn you bitter and cynical, people are cruel because they are struggling, hurt, and broken, and turn that around to others. Try to keep your heart open

Tell dad about everything going on. Don't stop telling him. He's the one who will help you get away from the bad stuff that's about to start, and keep it from getting worse. Things will still hurt, but not as much. He can help you through the confusion.

And he won't hate you for feelings you're already having. He'll help it make sense, help you find the words you keep looking for.

It's not your fault. Tell someone. You'll survive.

You have ADHD

Admitting you are wrong is the first step towards being less wrong

You are not that smart, you are just a guy with glasses that can't fight and makes sentences that are way too long

Be sure to be doubtful

Eh forget about that man. Despite sharing his name, he’s not even your real biological father. Family is about more than genetics.

Don't listen to what anyone else tells you.

It will never get any better for you. Only worse and worse.

Also never, ever, fall in love. The only women that will ever express any interest at all in you are mentally unstable abusers who will hurt you in ways far worse than your family ever did.

So you love watching anti-pride protests on YT, right? Actually you love cocks too. You're bi haha cope kiddo does fortnite dances.

It gets better. Seriously. You will find your people and be happy. It's just gonna take about seven or eight more years. I promise, life is worth living and you're gonna do great.

Keep a low profile and you'll be fine. Just don't take parenting/relationship advice from your parents.

Also: School stuff really is freaking easy if you'd put in just a little bit of real effort.

And skip that girl you meeed when you are 17. She's trouble.

You will miss your family, lose your friends, and your home will be taken from you.

YOU. ARE. A. GIRL!

no