You don't get to pick your trauma : whitepeopletwitter

[–] TTH4P@lemm.ee 60 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

God gives his strongest soldiers the hardest battles. 😢

[–] Squid1501@lemmy.world 37 points 2 months ago (2 children)

That sounds like Subway to me. They like making mayo sandwiches for some reason.

[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 10 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Light mayonnaise, please

proceeds to drown sandwich in it

[–] TheSlad@sh.itjust.works 9 points 2 months ago

Even if you dont ask for it! One time I just got done ordering my sandwich, they grab the mayo bottle and say "you want mayo?" Then jizz out half the bottle all over it before I can say no.

[–] gamermanh@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 2 months ago

As an ex sandwich artist, now sandwich artiste (I quit and do it at home for myself now):

I STARTED putting normal amounts of mayo. My owner was 1st Gen Chinese and frugal as fuck so she drove that into us "1 line, half if they ask for light, 2 line if say more" were her exact words

Sooooooooooo many people said "more. No, more" that we all started defaulting to more when someone asked

[–] Cadeillac@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

Ah, you wanted light regular mayonnaise, not lite mayonnaise

[–] blanketswithsmallpox@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

I call it the exploding mouth of mayonnaise technique.

Normally they don't give me nearly enough. Until one time I made it extra special clear that I wanted a bukkake in paper.

I got what I asked for and reluctantly ate every bit of it over like four days lol. I have a picture somewhere but I'm too lazy to find it.

[–] 30p87@feddit.org 32 points 2 months ago (3 children)

If anyone else has a hard time with getting subs: I'm free.

[–] NewAgeOldPerson@lemmy.world 10 points 2 months ago

Lol I read it the same way friend. I guess one can leave the life, but it never leaves you.

[–] tfw_no_toiletpaper@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

Feddit schwappt über

[–] pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 2 months ago

Tbh, the only connections you'll make with messages like this are fake internet doms who don't really care about you/your limits and try to push your boundaries. 0/10 would not recommend

[–] ChonkyOwlbear@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Well that is the whitest thing I've heard today.

[–] Asafum@feddit.nl 12 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Someone literally got killed for that.

I believe it was a subway and when they found an absolute shit ton of mayo on their sandwich they actually killed the person and shot another...

https://www.cnn.com/2022/06/28/us/subway-worker-mayo-dispute-killing/index.html

[–] derf82@lemmy.world 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

If your biggest stress is mayo in your sub, you have an easy life.

[–] VirtualOdour@sh.itjust.works 5 points 2 months ago

Not always true, a lot of the time people with serious issues have trouble with smaller issues because they're anxious and stressed but unable to mentally address the larger issues.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Weakly: "No... No... You already used a whole jar, don't get another..." 😴

[–] dumbass@leminal.space 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Man thats bullshit, I ask for extra mayo and all they give me is a vague hint of mayo.

[–] bittersweets@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

"oh you just want me to clean my knife on your bread from where I used it last?" I'm with you, complete bullshit.

[–] JohnWorks@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Relevant https://youtu.be/hX07NFted28

[–] tatterdemalion@programming.dev 2 points 2 months ago

lol I came looking for this. I can't watch the whole video because I get so upset.

[–] Etterra@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

I mean let's be honest, everyone has had a nightmare about mayo at some point in their lives.

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I have a similar beef with bagel places. I love bagels and I love cream cheese ... but I do not need a 3/4" thick hockey puck of fucking cream cheese on my bagel.

[–] ZoopZeZoop@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

I'll have your extra.

[–] Someonelol@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 2 months ago

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SBBuf8ne3sU&pp=ygUQaGlqaWthdGEgc3BlY2lhbA%3D%3D

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 2 months ago

This made me laugh a lot more than one might expect. Got a little light headed.

[–] pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 month ago

Sorry again, locking this thread because it's becoming weird.

[+] toynbee@lemmy.world -8 points 2 months ago

Mayo belongs on no sandwich. I've never voluntarily chosen a sandwich with mayo and never enjoyed it on any I accidentally picked.

[+] GeneralEmergency@lemmy.world -9 points 2 months ago (5 children)

Don't blame him. Mayo tastes like shit

[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I don't get the mayonnaise hate. I know us white people put it on everything, but it's literally eggs, vinegar, oil, sometimes mustard... I love all of those!

[–] cm0002@lemmy.world 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

People grow up on the shit tasting commercial crap or (shudders) Miracle Whip and then think all mayo tastes like it

I myself as a younger child fell into this and didn't really like Mayo until my preteen years when I realized that there's actually good tasting mayo out there

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I was raised with Miracle Whip and then discovered real mayonnaise as an adult. I introduced my parents to it and they love it now, but they have put the Miracle Whip into the memory hole and insist that we always had real mayonnaise. They also insist we never had liver when "liver night" was a weekly thing for my entire childhood. Miracle Whip is terrible but at least it's not liver.

[–] bitchkat@lemmy.world 0 points 2 months ago

Liver and onions are delicious though.

[–] cm0002@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago (4 children)

Most of the commercial mayo tastes like shit, real mayo (and a very select few and pricier brands) is delicious

[–] Wilzax@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

Dukes is my go to and it is used sparingly.

[–] TexasDrunk@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago

I like to make my own because it's quick, easy, and much tastier than most store bought, but I also understand that not everyone has an immersion blender or the desire for one.

I like to add fresh herbs to mine. A little dill or parsley really livens it up. I've tried mixing them in store bought and it's not the same.

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 0 points 2 months ago

Hellman's is fine.

[–] SchmidtGenetics@lemmy.world -5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I’ll die on my Miracle Whip hill.

[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I want to love Miracle Whip. But I think it simply isn't as good as mayonnaise or as tangy. Which is odd because that's literally in their marketing.

[–] SchmidtGenetics@lemmy.world -2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

If your mayonnaise is tangy it’s not mayonnaise… it’s flavored mayonnaise just like miracle whip.

There isn’t anything to add tang unless you season it, people are wild….

also seriously downvoted for adding an opinion to a discussion? This place fucking gets shittier by the day.

[–] affiliate@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

take it back

[–] joyjoy@lemm.ee 2 points 2 months ago

Meanwhile anime: "I have made mayo. I am now your god."

[–] TheSlad@sh.itjust.works -2 points 2 months ago

Mayo is so disgusting fr

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