this post was submitted on 05 Aug 2024
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News

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[–] ikidd@lemmy.world 62 points 3 months ago (4 children)

Going around, sniffing the couches she's sat on.

[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 3 months ago

That she sat on it is pure coincidence. He just does that to all couches

[–] ChillPenguin@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Ooooo... Is that.... Leather? Rubs between the couch cushions

[–] nkat2112@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)

This comment wins the Internet today.

[–] slackassassin@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 months ago

I ain't here to kink shame, and yet, I am.

[–] HWK_290@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

God, where is Triumph when we need him

[–] Ghostalmedia@lemmy.world 49 points 3 months ago

He’s following Harris around because Trump is literally too old and tired to do Harris’ level of campaigning. And in a few hours Harris will have a VP also running around. Best of luck JD. Harris has been flying to several states a day.

[–] Pacmanlives@lemmy.world 48 points 3 months ago (2 children)

JD she is not a voluptuous couch that you dream of

[–] adarza@lemmy.ca 14 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

jd's actually going up to wisconsin to visit ashley in arcadia. EAU just happens to be the airport he's flying into to get there.

[–] dogsnest@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago

B-B-But she's made with black indian leather!
A-A-And the p-p-pussy cat fragrance of dolphins.
Wearing rubber....gloves.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 30 points 3 months ago

This part is amazing:

Vance needled Harris on Monday for not being more accessible to reporters herself.

“This moment could set off a real economic calamity around the globe,” he wrote on X. “It requires steady leadership—the kind President Trump delivered for four years. Kamala Harris is too afraid to answer media questions and cannot lead us in these troubled times.”

Things are dire! We need leadership! Why isn't the vice president giving press conferences?

[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 26 points 3 months ago (1 children)

That JD Vance fucker is really cringe and weird.

[–] Xtallll@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 3 months ago

*That JD Vance the couch fucker is really cringe and weird.

[–] Draegur@lemm.ee 18 points 3 months ago

Bro her heritage is intersectional. It doesn't mean what you think it means!

[–] MyOpinion@lemm.ee 10 points 3 months ago

Such a weird stalker type of guy.

[–] anon_8675309@lemmy.world 10 points 3 months ago

Don’t forget your eyeliner.

[–] xmunk@sh.itjust.works 8 points 3 months ago
[–] Blackout@kbin.run 8 points 3 months ago

Just like a predator!

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

The couch fucker is also a stalker?

[–] SkavarSharraddas@gehirneimer.de 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Or a lost little dog that misses its master.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago (2 children)

He's definitely the master when it comes to fucking a couch. Much like other little dogs.

[–] jeffw@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago

mastur

FTFY

[–] DancingBear@midwest.social 2 points 3 months ago

He doesn’t even use lube like the rest of us

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Ohio man follows woman across country as she interviews for a promotion; believes octogenarian more capable despite him being let go from same position 4 years prior

[–] HubertManne@moist.catsweat.com 5 points 3 months ago

if your not the lead dog the view never changes.

[–] einlander@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago

Sloppy seconds