this post was submitted on 10 Aug 2024
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https://www.mystateline.com/news/national/almost-half-of-young-men-have-never-approached-a-woman-romantically-study/

“In the entire dataset, 29% of men said they never approached a woman in person before. 27% said it had been more than one year. This was larger for men in the age 18-25 group: 45% had never approached a woman in person,” according to the study.

A majority of single males surveyed reported fear as the main reason they do not approach women for dates in person. Fear of rejection and fear of social consequences were the two most common responses.

The data highlights a growing concern in the United States and abroad — loneliness. A 2023 report from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services found that almost half of U.S. adults report “measurable levels of loneliness.”

It's interesting to say the least. It seems as though the social repercussions and rejection are the most profound reason. While the fear of rejection is easy enough to digest. But I think the fear or social consequences is a relatively new construct.

From what I understand it's the fear of being viewed as a creep to approach a woman out of the blue. Which to me, is reasonable enough. But I don't think I have ever heard my old man or anyone of his generation bringing this to the table.

Yet I do remember asking my friends about picking up hints and whether or not men are really that bad at it. And most them saying the just don't want to risk misinterpreting it.

Perhaps there is an argument to be made that approaching women like this, has fallen out of social fashion. What do you guys think?

p.s. I hope this is casual enough of a conversation. I kinda screwed up my last one, I admit.

Edit: Here is a more detailed paper on the survey for those that are interested

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[–] HappycamperNZ@lemmy.world 3 points 4 months ago (1 children)

You're talking with people right now. That is all we're saying - find a group of people and just talk.

Well, I think we're people. Can never be sure.

[–] Empty@leminal.space 0 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Dude. Online interactions like these don't count at all. Anonymously being here protect us all from harm. I don't consider this a social activity at all. And it won't affect my real life

[–] HappycamperNZ@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Im curious - what do you think tinder (or grindr) start from? Pics sure, but after that?

[–] Empty@leminal.space -1 points 4 months ago (2 children)

What, those apps that never work and ask you for a lot of money? Also they sell your info and I don't feel like putting my face online.

[–] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 3 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I've met many people via dating apps, and I've never paid for them. I'm very average in appearance.

It doesn't really sound like you want the situation to change, but rather just want to complain about it.

[–] HappycamperNZ@lemmy.world 2 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Can't disagree with last point, what doesn't with your second to last.

Are they full of bots - yes. But people wouldn't be still returning if they didn't work. I know multiple couples that got together because of them, and its apparently something like 35% of couples are getting together that way. Others being uni, friends or work usually.

Look, im not you and you take what you will. You're choices are realistically keep doing the same thing and get the same results, or change something and get different results. Could be better, could be worse, and only one way to find out. Joys of being human.

[–] Empty@leminal.space -1 points 4 months ago

Yeah, and you know who usually hook up? The attractive, generic "interesting"ones. I'm not any of those things, is in my soul being retracted, quiet, not talkative and only doing stuff in my room, like gaming and maybe once a year going to the movies. That doesn't sound bad, at least for a short hook up to me, but apparently I'm not a catch for the rest of the "normal world". I guess people like me don't deserve love or even cuddling.