Trans guy here dealing with people constantly talking about me among other shit they've done because I've always lived in conservative areas. Even other queer people were awful especially gay and trans people.

I'm gonna move but I still won't be able to afford top surgery yet. I've been back on T for a while so I pass for the most part. I wanna go stealth after the move but how can I go stealth in a big city without isolating myself as a straight guy?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] uberrice@feddit.de 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

As someone not in those circles that just stumbled upon this post in all:

You look 'different' obviously, as you yourself know. That's going to get some reactions from some people - you can't really help that. That's fine, be yourself.

Other than that, don't make your whole identity that you are who you are. What I mean by that is - don't base your daily actions, what you do, what you always talk about, the friends you make solely on the fact that you are a transman. Just be a normal, decent human being - and I think you'll find a lot more 'general acceptance'.

Then again, just my 2 cents as an outsider, this is just my opinion and as I've obviously never had to go through this myself I have no idea if this works or not.

[–] Apicnic@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 year ago

It's a bit delayed to be responding to this comment, but I wanted to in case op is still hanging around this thread.

He doesn't necessarily need to be worried about 'looking different'. A lot of trans people, and trans men in particular, completely pass. Testosterone is strong as hell. People just always stick with their 'we can always tell' talking points, because when they see passing trans people, they don't assume they're trans.
The phrasing behind your second point is kind just of a rehash of a common anti lgbtq sentiment. The problem is, at least anecdotally for myself, that the people who would harass you consider that to be anything showing you're in some form queer or showing any pride in who you are. It's essentially a demand that people entirely hide part of them if they want to to be treated with respect.