this post was submitted on 12 May 2025
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its true. as a person with cptsd (bpd) ive mainly had to resort to giving myself the therapy i need through reading, being mindful every moment of the day (i legit have conversations with myself in real time to decide-what i want to say- vs the impact it will have), and psychiatric medication. The real difficult thing is getting the said person with BPD to WANT to change, and i mean with a desperate fervor, otherwise therapy is basically a silly talk session for me where i jab at the therapist to make them say what i want them to say.
too add an analogy to this, its like building a car with Kinex building sticks, painting it over and making it look like a normal vehicle but driving it is a whole different issue. you cant change the structure under the paint, but you can slowly reinforce every bit of it until its ready to drive on the freeway.
I never made the "jab at the therapist" connection before but you're right. A lot of the time it was like one of those dolls that talk when you pull the string and I was just pulling the string as many different ways as possible to see how many phrases it had.
Anyway, I appreciate the insight. It's rare to even realize there's a...problem/difference for us so hearing someone else's voice is very valuable.
its very real. My principle (a 72 year old educator) sent me to counseling after telling me, a fifteen year old boy, “there is something wrong with you”, however when i got to counseling i passed with flying colors. I legitimately thought i was normal for the longest time.
Honesty will take us a long way. Allistic people treat honesty like a two sided blade, but if you can find somebody who will let you know when youre being shitty and you can legitimately look up too (not a fucked up attachment syndrome where they’re perfect) then itll make all the difference.
oh and medication. Find a good psych, theres no shame in it and it beats self harm lol