Platypus

I've done most of what you asked and failed at it. I got rid of my guitar and I don't plan to touch it ever again, it depresses me trying to play. And bores me most of the time. I had a shit warehouse job were I was abused. I can't get any calls for a job anymore and I don't live where you live so no, the government of this city won't help me to get a job.

And I'm a bad person, I don't wanna help anyone, I'm tired of being used or feeling that I'm doing something for someone without getting paid.

I quit the gym already long ago, it depresses me and I'm broke

Not from America

I'm afraid of drugs, I don't even smoke. Plus is illegal in this country

I don't have money, live with my mother. I can't move anywhere.

I'm older than you. No, nothing changes

Nothing, I've never been in a bar in my 35 years of life.

Yet majority of YouTubers doing those reactions are literally doing that. Not only that, some of them put them in the title or in the opening, as a badge

Dude, everyone's a moron in the parody minus piccolo, Tenshinhan and maybe some other minor character. Also they skipped many character traits and lore.

Finally the humour they do is so unfunny most of the time, they use that stupid sitcom cliché of " a character saying something someone else said episodes ago despite not being in presence of said character" too much.

The worst part is that the few people that watches the actual show after this will think "oh there's no jokes and this character is too serious now, I can't watch this"... Because they were exposed to the parody.

That's the dumbest excuse ever. Any fan knows is inspired by journey to the west... So what? Also did you skipped the FACT that DB Is treated like royalty in Latin America? You're out

You watched the wrong show plus version first

Not in this case.