Nusm

joined 1 year ago
[–] Nusm@lemm.ee 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Nusm@lemm.ee 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This requires Norm McDonald’s moth joke:

https://youtu.be/jJN9mBRX3uo?si=yXu19Qvvac_jAfM7

A moth goes into a podiatrist’s office, and the podiatrist says, “What seems to be the problem, moth?”

The moth says “What’s the problem? Where do I begin, man? I go to work for Gregory Illinivich, and all day long I work. Honestly doc, I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. I don’t even know if Gregory Illinivich knows. He only knows that he has power over me, and that seems to bring him happiness. But I don’t know, I wake up in a malaise, and I walk here and there… at night I…I sometimes wake up and I turn to some old lady in my bed that’s on my arm. A lady that I once loved, doc. I don’t know where to turn to. My youngest, Alexendria, she fell in the…in the cold of last year. The cold took her down, as it did many of us. And my other boy, and this is the hardest pill to swallow, doc. My other boy, Gregarro Ivinalititavitch… I no longer love him. As much as it pains me to say, when I look in his eyes, all I see is the same cowardice that I… that I catch when I take a glimpse of my own face in the mirror. If only I wasn’t such a coward, then perhaps…perhaps I could bring myself to reach over to that cocked and loaded gun that lays on the bedside behind me and end this hellish facade once and for all…Doc, sometimes I feel like a spider, even though I’m a moth, just barely hanging on to my web with an everlasting fire underneath me. I’m not feeling good."

And so the doctor says, “Moth, man, you’re troubled. But you should be seeing a psychiatrist. Why on earth did you come here?”

And the moth says, “‘Cause the light was on."

[–] Nusm@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Raise hand.

But if you switch to the opposite and then switch back, it will normally fix the issue with Memmy.

[–] Nusm@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I love watching Cops, because, it makes me feel better about myself. No matter what dumb thing I do, I’ll never do anything as dumb as some of those people!

[–] Nusm@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago

I don't miss constantly running around changing incandescent light bulbs! It seemed like there was always one burned out in the house somewhere. In my experience the newer bulbs don't necessarily last the length of time that's advertised, but they sure as heck last longer than the old style.

[–] Nusm@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago

I don't miss the cassette tapes, but I don't miss even more the big cassette cases that I used to carry in my car with all the tapes in it!

[–] Nusm@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I don't miss it at all, but I couldn't afford to do it today! The government is obviously trying to price people out of doing it. That's not why I quit, but it would certainly make me if I still was.

[–] Nusm@lemm.ee 8 points 1 year ago

Read all about it in this month's issue of DUH.

[–] Nusm@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago
[–] Nusm@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago

Am I the only one that sees Uncle Lewis from National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation?!?

[–] Nusm@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago

Thanks for the update!

[–] Nusm@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Just wondering if you had time to make an .exe for Windows of this? I don't see it on the download link.

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