this post was submitted on 27 Feb 2024
772 points (98.6% liked)

The Onion

4449 readers
660 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] espentan@lemmy.world 87 points 8 months ago (2 children)

This was me, skiing with my dad when I was a kid. Brand new Amiga 500 waiting in my room, along with 200 borrowed floppies, and dad wants to spend the Saturday skiing. Yay.

[–] MentallyExhausted@reddthat.com 37 points 8 months ago (2 children)
[–] espentan@lemmy.world 31 points 8 months ago

Yeah, he was :)

[–] schmidtster@lemmy.world 7 points 8 months ago (1 children)

It’s great that dad wanted to spend time, but could also spend time doing stuff the kid likes or wants too.

[–] RinseDrizzle@midwest.social 27 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (5 children)

As a lifelong avid gamer who's definitely more an inside cat than an outdoors lad, I always immensely appreciate pops, gf, or the crew whenever they lovingly push me out into nature biz. Yes, the fishing trips can be boring af in the moment. Yes, I've wondered if camping is worth the effort. For sure, I've been on hikes where I fantasize about that hot new game at home.

In the end I'm always reflecting on the time fondly.

It's good to be out of your comfort zone sometimes. And nearly everybody could use more fresh air these days.

[–] fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.world 6 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Perfectly said. As a kid I never appreciated the things my dad made me do. But as an adult I really appreciate it.

I also think it helped me appreciate the games at home more. Once I graduated high school and spent the entire summer at home inside I got really fucking bored of my games really fast.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] RabbePompano@lemmy.world 4 points 8 months ago
[–] Rodeo@lemmy.ca 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Honestly it doesn't even matter whether you liked or look back on it fondly or not. The only thing that matters is that you had the experience.

Experiencing different things is good for people no matter whether they like it or not. The experience is valuable in itself.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] turtlepower@lemm.ee 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

That's just sad. I had an NES, a Gameboy, an SNES, and an N64 when they came out and I ALWAYS like doing things and getting out. My mom, granddad, and one aunt would all go skiing in the winter and bike riding in the summer, and I enjoyed every fucking minute of it. I also enjoy every fucking minute of my video games. But I knew they'd still be there when I got done having other kinds of fun.

[–] picnicolas@slrpnk.net 12 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Get a load of this guy and their healthy upbringing :,)

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] TheImpressiveX@lemmy.ml 78 points 8 months ago
[–] denast@lemm.ee 47 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I've used to do semi-competitive swimming as a child. Honestly one of the worst (as in boring, great for health and fixed my scoliosis) types of sport to do for an agitated child who wants to explore the world.

For an hour and a half you do laps while staring at the tiles on the bottom of your olympic pool. Would spend the entire time memorizing every crack on the tiles as well as doing entire video game playthroughs in my head lol

[–] DragonTypeWyvern 3 points 8 months ago

They actually sell headphones now that work for swimmers.

[–] phoneymouse@lemmy.world 32 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] darelik@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago
[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 30 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Wait, why did they post real content?

[–] DragonTypeWyvern 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

If the Onion stopped posting satire and just started posting actual "human interest" stories and quotes from insane people on Facebook, how would we know?

How long could they get away with it?

[–] SuperSynthia@lemmy.world 4 points 8 months ago

Part of me thinks they already do haha

[–] dditty@lemm.ee 30 points 8 months ago (1 children)

This was me in church every Sunday calculating how many lobsters id have to sell to buy a full set of Rune armor in RuneScape

[–] Aermis@lemmy.world 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

F I miss the gold runescape days.

[–] Poem_for_your_sprog@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Old school RuneScape is pretty great. I do fishing and stuff on the treadmill and then PvP when I'm on my PC.

[–] fsxylo@sh.itjust.works 2 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Jagex has made it a pain in the ass to cancel membership now, so they finally fucked up enough to get me to quit for good.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] hoxbug@lemmy.world 27 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I haven't properly played Minecraft in years but I find myself out in nature and just imagining how I would build the area up, how the house would be made, what sort of pathways I would make. Guess what I am saying is I left Minecraft a while back but it has not left me yet.

[–] Godnroc@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago

And I can't play it anymore because it just makes me want to start doing that to the real world.

[–] chatokun@lemmy.dbzer0.com 24 points 8 months ago (2 children)

To be honest, I've done that while enjoying the activity I was doing, or at least not resenting it. I have ADHD so I know I can hyperfocus on something for too long, but I also k ow I can burn out. So I specifically stop doing things I want to keep doing because I know I'll enjoy it more later if I do so.

[–] flicker@lemmy.world 12 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Stopping the hyperfocus activity before burning it out?

Is this a power you can learn?

[–] Wolf_359@lemmy.world 8 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Right?

My ADHD is shaped like this: Hyperfocus on a new interest. Read everything about it. It's the best thing ever. Think about it while doing other things. Then about a week or two later, I have 6% less fun when I do that thing and it's time for a new interest.

I'm honestly very good at many things you can learn in a week or two for this reason. I also have at least a laymen's understanding of many, many topics. But I am an expert in nothing.

When I'm very lucky, my interests overlap later and I can look like a pro when I "just started" this new hobby.

Plenty of non-gaming examples but one that comes to mind is Besiege / Trailmakers. I loved Besiege deeply for about two weeks. Built everything you could build in that time. When I played Trailmakers, I was outbuilding my much smarter friend because I already had a pretty good understanding of how the gyros and logic blocks would or wouldn't work in that type of game.

ADHD really is the perfect example of a blessing and a curse. A superpower with an equal and opposite cost.

[–] blazeknave@lemmy.world 6 points 8 months ago

Lost in the Android store looking for a game to play, not noticing my PC game has now loaded, and I no longer need a mobile game to make it through the PC game load time.

[–] FlashZordon@lemmy.world 20 points 8 months ago (3 children)

On Day One of a three week trip I bought Pokemon Silver the day it came out. I didn't even bring my GameBoy with me that trip because we were going camping on Day Two.

Longest 3 weeks of my life.

[–] The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world 7 points 8 months ago

I'm sure the level of excitement when you got back home and could play was indescribable.

[–] prettybunnys@sh.itjust.works 2 points 8 months ago

Yep.

Did a cross country trip from the east coast to the Grand Canyon in a van as a kid.

Stopped at some old family friends who bought me StarTropics for the NES. This was day 2 or 3 of the trip. We spent the whole summer driving to the Grand Canyon and back with that cartridge in the back of the car…

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 18 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Yup that was me as a kid lol. Took me a long time to just enjoy where I was at and not rush to do the thing that gave the most dopamine. Games, porn, drugs, sex... There's always something to jonse for, but just breathing in and out where your at and relaxing where you are just doing what you're doing is super great

[–] dgbbad@lemmy.zip 6 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I'm about to be 38 and this is still me. It's rare that I can sit somewhere and not be thinking of the thing that I'm dying to get back to. Even vacations are almost always a miserable experience. Is there a trick to turning off that part of my brain? I don't want to be anywhere but home 99% of the time.

[–] Ferrous@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 8 months ago (2 children)
[–] DragonTypeWyvern 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I don't see how sucking a pleasantly plump dick is going to help them appreciate nature, but it's worth a shot.

[–] Kenny@feddit.de 2 points 8 months ago

Definitely worth a shot… I‘ve heard or something

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Caligvla@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Hey, I don't cotton to people spying on my childhood!

[–] samus12345@lemmy.world 4 points 8 months ago

Or my adulthood, for that matter.

[–] rainynight65@feddit.de 14 points 8 months ago

Y' know - if it gets the kid through the hike, there's nothing wrong with it. (Yes, I know it's the onion, but let's be real).

When I was a kid, I had my nose in books all the time. On long road trips, my parents sometimes told me to put down the book and look out the window, appreciate the landscape. I had no appreciation for landscape at that age. I do now that I'm in my mid-40s. But back then? I wanted to read my books.

My parents loved to go on long hikes. I kept up, I sometimes struggled, I sometimes hated it. What was I looking forward to at the end of the hike? Settling down with one of my books. My reward, if you so will. I like a good hike these days, back then not so much. If I'd had video games at the time, I'd probably have fantasised about them too, if it got me through a long and (in my mind) boring hike.

[–] DAMunzy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 12 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Fuck, I'm a 12yo stuck in an old man dad bod.

[–] captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure I'm a 17 year old stuck in an old man dad bod, and it's fucking amazing. People sell me booze and power tools without question.

[–] DAMunzy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Don't forget spray paint and lighters!

[–] captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 3 points 8 months ago (2 children)

I can just...rent a bulldozer. Whenever I want. And no one will even try to stop me. Not until it's too late, at least.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] willsenior@lemm.ee 9 points 8 months ago

The only thing I ever saw break my kids' device spell was the Grand Canyon. When we walked up to it, my son was stunned and said, "Whoa, what happened?"

[–] OleoSaccharum@lemm.ee 6 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Literally was thinking about how I'd have made my last worldgen datapacks differently on my last hike.

It started snowing in the middle and I ended up going for like 5 times longer than I intended and meandering all over every path on Cougar Mountain literally, I'm embarrassed to say how long I was out. Had to do all my errands today instead. Was totally transfixed by the beauty of these gigantic Dippin Dots ass snowflakes

I saw what I was looking at, kind of, the beautiful lichens and mosses. But I constantly thought about them in potential Minecraft/Minetest terms. Worst Tetris effect there is!

[–] Scrollone@feddit.it 6 points 8 months ago

Story of my life

[–] Zuberi@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 8 months ago

Cries in his 30s

[–] SomeAmateur@sh.itjust.works 4 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Having the down time to let my mind wander is one of the best parts of hiking or any other alone time, even if it's about the stuff you plan to do when you're done. It's underrated imo

load more comments
view more: next ›