After being forced to use Azure DevOps instead of JIRA... I wish I had JIRA back...
Programmer Humor
Welcome to Programmer Humor!
This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!
For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.
Rules
- Keep content in english
- No advertisements
- Posts must be related to programming or programmer topics
I don't care what M$ says, Azure DevOps is being left for dead. As someone who worked on the System Center space for years, I know the signs of a product they want to kill but can't. I'm convinced the only reason it is still around is because some internal teams haven't moved to GitHub yet.
Fuck. Monday is tomorrow. I go back to this shit, and pretending to care about my job...
Jira is the worst project manager software, except for all the others - Churchill
I would take literally anything above Service Now.
Hahahaha my org is trying to force service now down out throats, ugh make it stop, I'm dying
Where is "slapping management insistent on AI?"
Ah man, my boss wants to get our department Meta glasses for taking pictures of parts we make, we literally get a bonus on our pay cheques for us having our phones on us an be reachable.
I would prefer Jira over ServiceNow, my previous job had jira and it ran smooth, ServiceNow is just a clunky mess
As a ServiceNow dev/admin, I support this opinion so hard.
I've worked at a company that used both. One for development the other for support tickets.
The idea that people would use ServiceNow for development tasks is scary.
I was a vocal hater of Jira till I switched to a company that rolled their own ticketing system. Now I love Jira.
Not having to use windows is the very basic
So basic it should be a human right.
Confluence is implied as being part of the lower parts of the pyramid yeah?
God, confluence is so fukcing dogshit.
I wish it wasn't. Ideally having a central knowledge base for your project with all sorts of features sounds amazing.
Then you get confluence, where loading a si gle page somehow takes 7 seconds, and your documentation is split among dozens of pages each if which take equally as long or longer to load.
Folders take like 3-4 seconds to unfold and reveal what documents are inside.
It's such a piece of shit
Confluence, the place where you do a bunch of documentation and then later forget you wrote it or can't find it anymore and have to rewrite it all in a separate Confluence folder only to repeat it all later?
My team at work has several different team docs folders ranging from severely outdated to new but soon to be outdated
I'm convinced that Jira is difficult on purpose to sell more consultancy and gold partnerships and trainers
No consultancy can ever make Jira fast. It’s incredible that it takes several seconds just to open a motherfucking goddamn issue.
I swear all their SQL is select * from *;
Sometimes you'll search for a ticket and it straight up just doesn't find it. Then you search for it again and wow, now it's suddenly appeared.
As a person who has designed several enterprise data models, I would like to personally congratulate the entire middle school class that belched up Atlassian's
next time my job asks me to install teams on my phone, I'm gonna hand them a list of rental costs for access to my phone/internet and to cover any security related issues.
I told them my os is non standard, Graphene, and if they need anything more than 2fa codes, it'd need to be on one of their devices.
My company stopped allowing OTP and required Microsoft Authenticator on personal phones. I was one of the few to refuse, eventually they gave me a Fido key. While I also use a less Google version of Android, I didn't talk about that when it was happened, just the principal that this is my phone, not the companies.
One of my previous jobs required we updated our personal phones and ticked a box in a document every month so that the company chat app was "on a secure environment/device".
I normally keep my phone up to date, but my employer shouldn't be telling me what to do with my private phone. I removed the company chat app since I didn't want to comply with them controlling my personal devices.
After that they couldn't reach me after hours. Great. After about 6 months they allowed me to use the chat app on my private phone again without insight or control over it. It may sound petty, but I think it's an important distinction.
Why are you using your own phone for work?
I feel like my company pays me well just to deal with all the crappy software we have to use. Teams, Jira, Salesforce, ServiceNow, it's quite the shitsym.
I actually like Jira. I have my own workflow where I fetch my tickets via Emacs to Orgmode and then work from there. Integration is read-only but that is what I need 99% of the time.
My previous job was tech support for multiple companies. One of our clients was using Salesforce. Another client used Jira.
A handful of clients were using their own Teams to which I had to connect or run using Citrix and Pulse Secure/Ivanti. Sometimes I had to juggle between three or four Teams.
I'm so glad I quit. I can only hope my next employer won't use Teams, but I won't hold my breath.
What's a good alternative to Jira?
Goose farming
GitHub tickets are fine.
Jira is complicated because PMs want it to do everything. It can, but there's no good reason for it.
Yeah, jira is too customizable. I mean I wouldn’t give any of it up, but the one time someone let me have the reins, I mostly simplified. Removed workflows, removed customizations.
There needs to be better ways of defining standard projects and sticking to them. Currently everyone wants their little tweak and you can’t even pick out what’s consistent and what’s not until you run into problems
just one more workflow bro. i promise bro just one more custom workflow and it'll fix everything bro. bro, just one more scheme. please just one more, one more custom field and we can fix this whole project bro, bro cmon just give me one more automation rule i promise bro, bro bro please ! just need one more permission scheme bro please bro i can fix this i swear bro just one more post-function bro please