this post was submitted on 27 Jun 2025
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Ass crack bandit!
Troy Barnes: So please, approve the Dean's new security measure called "Troy's law.", because a camera in the bathroom...
[He chokes up]
Troy Barnes: is better than a quarter in your butt.
Dean Pelton: As we've seen, the Ass Crack Bandit can be defeated by using the three "B"s: Belts, briefs, and buddies. Good. The bandit always gets his victims when they're alone. Bend over with friends over.
Yet another reason why I work remotely.
Why does one of the jugs have an infection warning on it? Are these bio samples at a lab and the locks are a safety measure?
I worked at a hospital, and sometimes the Emergency Dept nurses would be cheeky and use the biohazard bags and stickers for their food items. nobody is going to eat my cookies if they have to blindly trust someone being a joker lol
I remember solving something similar using an opaque bottle with "GI supplements, don't drink" written in sharpie. Especially since the first time it was actually true and they didn't believe the warning.
I used to live in a shared house and made some hot honey. Bunch of chillis chopped and simmered in honey.
I found a tiny amount on a pizza was good to add a hint of sweet and made it pretty spicy. Can't imagine having it concentrated on toast goes down too well but that is what someone did when they stole it.
Don't give me ideas... I love spicy stuff, and it has been a pretty good deterrent in of itself from having my foodstuffs stolen. So two birds with one stone...
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How about fixing the problem by having the management provide free milk? It's about a pound a day for them and everyone is happier.
My office provides free milk, but they some times don’t refill it for days, so whether you’ll have milk for your coffee becomes a gamble and then people get pissed when it’s not there. My solution is to just buy or bring my coffee with milk before work and drink tea at work (don’t take milk).
Trent the milk guzzler arrives at 6 and drinks it all.
Fuck you Trent!
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I work at a place that went from having bbq's and get togethers to... well, nothing in about five years. Yesterday we got a company wide e-mail to tell us the CEO is GTFO'ing and being replaced by an external hire. I'm not worried at all though. In fact, I'm kinda hoping to be fired for the severance. Fuck this job :D
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Who can be bothered to steal someone else's semi-skimmed milk anyway‽ Full cream or bust.