Two weeks after I explained to my father why I had an abortion ... and he calmly said he understood my reasons ... he told me I'd murdered his grandchild.
He was a real winner, my dad.
1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
2) All posts must end with a '?'
This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?
3) No spam
Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.
4) NSFW is okay, within reason
Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com.
NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].
5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions.
If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world or !askusa@discuss.online
Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.
Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
Two weeks after I explained to my father why I had an abortion ... and he calmly said he understood my reasons ... he told me I'd murdered his grandchild.
He was a real winner, my dad.
I'm so sorry he responded like that, he's not the one who would have carried, birthed, and raised that child. I hope you're doing okay and are at peace with the decision you made.
Thanks. I'm good. I thought long and hard about it beforehand because I didn't want to regret my decision.
The monster that raised me was a real piece of work.
Context: she adopted me and 3 others. The other 3 were adopted when she was a single parent.
That last one was fun. I met my partner and snuck out in the middle of the night to fly across the world just to get away from her. She reported me as kidnapped multiple times even after I contacted the detectives AND her to let her know I was only following instructions. Then she denied she ever said that. That was the last time I spoke to her, over a decade ago.
I’m in therapy twice a week for the past few years, was recently diagnosed with adhd and autism, and non-binary transfem. My partner is Indonesian. She can rot in piss.
yeah. the majority of stuff they'd say was like that, in fact. it's part of why i don't talk to them anymore lol
Borderline Personality Disorder is not a ride I ever asked to be on.
A few days ago my mom made a "joke" that clearly having good kids skipped a generation right after commenting about how well behaved my kids were.
With my own kids now I've been realizing how many of the "behaviors" my parents would complain about and expect me to improve upon were just normal kid stuff
"must be good parenting skipped a generation"
While writing my master thesis my professor suddenly left the university. Noone ever really knew why and there was no official statement other than a short sentence on the website that Prof. XYZ has left the department. My master thesis was on hold while I had to find a new professor. My mother, who has always accused me of being lazy and lying, insisted that it was all a lie. When I pointed out the news on the university website, she said: "I don't know how you hacked the website and got it to display your lies, but I'm not falling for your deceit." I am not a computer science major, I studied linguistics.
I am not a computer science major, I studied linguistics.
We're not falling for your deceit, Noam Chomsky. You probably used some context-free grammar to hack the website.
My step father told me about the time he told my biological father that he had slept with my mom.
I was a small child and we were all living in a house together, my mom, biological father and step father(my bio dads bff at the time). Step father took my bio father out and told him what they had done. My bio father was so happy to hear the news he shook my step father's hand and thanked him profusely. He then proceeded to tell my step father how he wanted to burn the house down with me and my mom in it so this is the best news he could possibly get.
After my step father told me this story he followed it up with "at that moment I should have known and left your mother" 🫠
** record scratch noises **
I'm guessing your Mom is now on 'team Bear'.
I would consider that your Mom is the problem here except that the dudes lumped you in with being burned alive, and that suggests they are the PoS.
Lol she's on team dead and yes.
My grandparents came to the US from Germany. Upon hearing my dad say black people that don’t like trumps (1.0) America should go back to Africa, i reminded him that most of them are way more American than we are. I could hear his brain break through the phone
My dad said various things about “dirty Mexicans”, eugenic stuff about black people or people with severe mental handicaps, and always had some offhand extreme solution for non-conformists who rocked the boat.
He kept it mostly under wraps when I was younger, but as he got older and the Fox News worm ate into his and his social circle’s brains it started leaking out a lot more.
Being sent off to “military school” was an occasional threat. Like that was going to magically fix things.
I was talking to my father about the war in Palestine (my family and I are Jewish so its not unusual). I said "hey maybe peace is a better way of combatting terrorism", he responded that concentration camps should be built to combat terrorism and strip the Palestinians of their culture and identity.
"When education isn't liberating, the dream of the oppressed is to become the oppressor" - Paulo Freire
Excellent quote and deeply, tragically profound.
l've noticed the modern philosophizing kids have distilled this mentality down to the mocking phrase:
"One day I'll get to be the one wearing the boot! :D"
It's an extremely unfortunate quote especially when you consider the context of Paulo Freire's work: he was an educator that understood that teaching should not be an assembly line even back in 1960s, when the adult illiterate population was very large. One of his feats was coming with with a method that successfully meshed adults' livelihoods and work as means to teach them how to read and write in record time. To the country's despair, the 1964 coup killed any chance of his method being applied nationwide. He was jailed for a bit over 2 months as "traitor" then had to exile himself.
Yet, to this day, he's demonized by the political right as a subversive communist and the main "culprit", according to them, for the failures of our education system ("they only teach ideology at schools and universities!!!!"), despite his methods only ever being applied in very limited places and times.
conservatives never going to schools love to say that about schools, but are silent on christian only schools.
My dad, the tech genius that he is, has been against every minor step forward since the 90's:
"Why do i need an answering machine, if they need me, they'll call back." He worked for himself as a handyman, so this is plain ridiculous. Finally, someone gives him an answering machine and suddenly it's "This is awesome! I never miss a call! I've got so much work!" Later it was "Why do I need a debit card? I can just write a check!" which evolved to "It's so convenient! I can get gas, even when they're closed!" He repeated the answering machine argument when cell phones arrived, and repeated the results when he finally got one.
It's a running theme in his life. The one that really gobsmacked me was when he proudly declared "the Internet can't hurt me if i don't get on it!"
I think the saddest part about this is the phenomenon where people who didn't understand tech were scared of new stuff that was actually really neat and helpful....
...and nowadays they're ridiculously trusting of shiny user-friendly corporate garbage that spies on them and manipulates them.
Reading this makes me realize how many people had really fucked up childhoods. I feel sorry for all of you, don't give up hope for humanity, and choose (if you can) how to live your own life. There are better people out there.
The money thing is such a fucked up thing to say. “Do you know how much money you cost?!” As if the price of raising children is something a 6 yo is responsible for!
If I was gay I’d have to be lobotomized, not would or could, I’d have to be.. and he’d do it himself. 10 yo and wanted my dad dead.
And the insane gaslighting! He’d stink of cigarettes, reeeeek! Clearly he’d been smoking, but would deny it with the shittiest lies: person X blew smoke in my face! I walked past someone who smoked!
Or when I got a bicycle, dad would guilt trip me af for having spent money on it. And whenever I couldn’t cycle, meaning it would take 10 yo me an hour to get there (20ish KM), he’d be fuming and say he’d sell the bike since I’m not using it..
I’m firmly a believer that having children shouldn’t be allowed for everyone. Some people are terrible and should be sterilized and enslaved. I just don’t know how to implement it, yet!
My dad recently buult a new garden shed in the garden for tools and gardening stuff. He now started refering to the gazebo in the same garden as "the old shed" for some fucking reason. We were doing something that required power and ge asked me to plug in an extension in the shed. I do that and a couple minutes later he berates me and says he meant the old shed. When I asked if he meant the gazebo, he looked at me as if I had slapped him in the face. We've had the gazebo for about 15 years now I think and nobody ever called anything but that.
I was eating dinner with my dad a year ago when he told me about how he believes jews secretly run the world and that there’s something fishy about the Rothschilds. I burst out laughing thinking my dad had suddenly developed a very modern online sense of humor, but unfortunately no.
I’ve never known my dad to be antisemitic, and he even explained that regular jews are a different group from the ones in control.
I straight up told him it’s ridiculous and that he needs to get off the internet, but he never agreed with me. I still don’t know how to handle the situation really.
Oh and my mom went borderline sovereign citizen a few years ago, but I don’t remember what insane thing she said first.
I straight up told him it’s ridiculous and that he needs to get off the internet...
Which is especially crazy when I imagine I'm not the only one who was constantly told my personally developed views were influenced purely from "listening to all those liberals on the internet."
Confirmation bias is a helluva drug, pops. :(
one time when I was little I heard my mum making weird noises in her room. i didn't go check why. the next morning i asked her why were you making weird noises? she said "I was imagining eating Chinese food that was so good"
Let me add to that, this is something my own mother said while being of sound mind:
I'll forgive you if you come back to God. My crime was finally standing up to her abuse and her insane religious bullshit (at 16) and moving out (at 18). Conditional love, just like Jesus preached lol
I was pregnant as the oldest daughter- three month later my sister told us she's pregnant too. My mother (having a boyfriend of my age at that time): "Oh wouldn't it be fun if I get pregnant too now?"
I couldn't believe what I heard (she is an abusive parent, only 2 of her 9 children contact her at all now, the other have gone non-contact)
Yeah my dad has said so many things that have left me stunned. I have had to explain tax brackets to this man so many fucking times. He keeps thinking if he goes up a bracket the overall tax % will increase and therefore he will actually have less money.
My mother used to call me a son of a bitch until I one day replied "I know".
Or
"I don't believe in god because of the things He has done to me, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't believe in Him"
She also talked about her "schizo friend" quite a lot, as if the events were recent, even though there was no chance she had seen the person in over a decade.
We don't speak anymore.
There's too many.
Off the top of my head, a fav dark one might be their serious quoting the Bible to me about how any child that isn't respectful or submissive should be killed.
Some fucked interpretation of Deuteronomy about stoning a child in public or something.