this post was submitted on 08 May 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] LadyButterfly@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

Honestly unsure if this is fake, thanks 2025!

[–] PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca 14 points 2 days ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (4 children)

Blessed is the round, and blessed is the cartridge for it holds the round and all of its fury
Blessed is the magazine for receiving the round and holding it close.
Blessed is the barrel, for providing direction and guidance to the round
And most of all, blessed is Kurt Cobain for giving the round purpose, and for receiving all of its love within his body 😌

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I do not aim with my hand; he who aims with his hand has forgotten the face of his father. I aim with my eye...

[–] JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 day ago

I kill with my heart

Thankee sai

Yes I know, it was a shotty.

[–] superkret@feddit.org 4 points 2 days ago

This is my rifle
This is my nun
This is for shooting
This is for fun

[–] kerrigan778@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 days ago (5 children)

Apparently the way to make suicide jokes still funny in 2025 is to have had it happen in the 90s and for the person to be famous and queer?

[–] ArchmageAzor@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

what does him being queer have to do with it?

Also people are now making jokes about 9/11. Tragedy turns into comedy after 20 years.

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Definitely queer, impossible to say for certain if they were trans because they never had a chance to figure that out but based on a lot of things they said and did it seems likely.

Wat

Cobain was just the first person I thought of that'd make it clear it was satire, and I didn't wanna spend all night working on a stupid joke

[–] nagaram@startrek.website 2 points 1 day ago

Were they not supposed to be funny normally?

Are we not all on the brink?

LETS GO

of what?

[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] bruhduh@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Yes daddy πŸ₯΅πŸ₯΅πŸ₯΅

[–] Crumbgrabber@lemm.ee 63 points 3 days ago (1 children)

There is no hand grenade in the picture, I call bullshit

[–] prettybunnys@sh.itjust.works 55 points 3 days ago (3 children)

The holy hand grenade of Antioch is a Anglican relic you absolute dolt.

[–] Crumbgrabber@lemm.ee 15 points 3 days ago

Who are the angles? I didn't vote for them.

[–] WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] FrChazzz@lemm.ee 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

[contemplates going on a tangent about the Branch Theory of Anglican identity, decides against it]

[–] scholar@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] FrChazzz@lemm.ee 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

So, Anglican theologians like John Keble and John Henry Newman (who later converted to Roman Catholicism) built off of a notion advanced by the 16th Century Anglican Divines that viewed Anglican Christianity as a distinct branch that developed alongside Roman Catholicism and Orthodoxy. Things like the Synod of Whitby are cited as evidence that the Roman church worked hard to bring this distinct form of the church inline with Roman polity and practices (in some views Celtic Christianity is viewed as being part of this wider β€œEnglish” branch of the faith). This resulted in a long-standing tenuous relationship with English Christianity and the Catholicism of continental Europe (reflected in things like the Sarum rite, etc.). So when the Reformation happened, this gave the opportunity for English Christianity to pick up where they left off and live into that distinct mode of being.

Given this, according to branch theory proponents, there would be Anglicans in the 900s. They were just put under the veil of Roman Christianity at the time.

Ah, the Roman Catholic Church and government. One of the most destructive and violent church governments on the last 2 millinea, now they are still very rapy molesty, but now the world's largest realty corporation that pays zero taxes.

Wait... no, it's still the same as the last 2 millinea, given the roman Catholic Church government's didn't pay taxes and owned a massive amount of stolen and conquered land

[–] modeler@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

Yeah - there's actual video evidence of it exploding! Unfortunately that means that it no longer exists, so that would explain why it's absent from the Pope's blessèd gun rack.

[–] unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de 65 points 3 days ago (3 children)

This has actually happened many times in history and recently. So this image might be real.

[–] fossilesque@mander.xyz 38 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com 95 points 3 days ago (5 children)

For those who don’t want to visit Facebook:

The priest is blessing hunting rifles at the beginning of the season so that they will provide food and not harm people.

[–] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 34 points 3 days ago (2 children)

But humans can be food, and less people means more food for the rest of us, which overall doesn't harm people...

grabs rifle

[–] WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com 27 points 3 days ago (5 children)

I know you’re joking, but humans eating humans is how you get kuru disease. The only safe way to eat a person is to process them into Soylent Green first.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kuru_(disease)

[–] saigot@lemmy.ca 18 points 3 days ago (2 children)

If you don't eat the brain you'll have a much much lower risk (your link suggests about 9x less likely), and if the person you eat wasn't a cannibal then your risk is lower still.

Also worth mentioning that Kuru is a specific disease for natives in Papua new guinea , and it only existed for about 100years and was going away on it's own when the cannibalistic practice was outlawed.

I think the health risks of cannibalism is very exaggerated.

(this is not an endorsement of cannibalism)

[–] Jumi@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago

I'm just gonna ignore your last sentence

Thanks for the cannibalism tips.

[–] raltoid@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Kuru is just one form of prion disease that was found in one group of people. And from what I remember, it has never been found elsewhere, as it most likely developed as a sub-type of Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease(another prion disease)

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[–] vordalack@lemm.ee 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Baptizing converts in Jack Danials and performing exorcisms using the US constitution, let's f***ing go

[–] nexguy@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

farting? ...no it's fishing isn't it.

[–] vordalack@lemm.ee 4 points 1 day ago

By the grace of the Omnissiah

[–] xorollo@leminal.space 4 points 2 days ago
[–] polite_cat@lemmy.world 33 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Do they deal holy damage now?

[–] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 27 points 3 days ago (4 children)
+10 holy damage
+3 critical hit chance
+2 accuracy
-5 damage against atheists
[–] VitoRobles@lemmy.today 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

How much damage can a human take though?

Based on these stats, going to guess 10-15HP, tops.

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