this post was submitted on 15 Oct 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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all 41 comments
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[–] TheRealLinga@sh.itjust.works 107 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Truly a wholesome and inspiring post!

OP should crosspost this to wholesome!!

[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 35 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It's definitely on the level of the average US "wholesome" story.

"Cancer riddled kid chooses to pay for classmates lunches instead of chemotherapy, dies with a happy smile"

[–] moriquende@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago

Capitalism allowed that kid to die happy

He is truly a good Catholic.
Murder victims go to heaven while you go straight down to the boiler room after suicide

Thots and payers, everyone

[–] Dpof@lemmy.world 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 23 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Nor condoms, it turns out.

[–] robocall@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Can you get an STD from fucking a corpse?

[–] some_random_nick@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

It's not like the STD vanishes after ~~jumping~~ being pushed.

[–] FelixCress@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

Asking for a friend?

[–] Dpof@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago
[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Sounds like he's just an accomplice. Gravity is the killer.

[–] werefreeatlast@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

Actually the rocks, ground, water etc probably do the actual murdering. Gravity just plays the role of inevitable force or rather acceleration. Rally much innocent like the road is to a car crash even though you wouldn't have the same crash without the road.

[–] orcrist@lemm.ee 15 points 1 month ago

That's f****** brilliant.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 14 points 1 month ago

Not all heroes wear capes.

[–] can@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] bstix@feddit.dk 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It doesn't mention a cause of death. Someone eventually pursueded hiim?

[–] kibiz0r@midwest.social 18 points 1 month ago (2 children)

He had an aneurysm, caused by a horrendous misspelling of the word β€œpersuaded”.

[–] bstix@feddit.dk 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

New phone.. my autocorrcors needs practice.

[–] Veneroso@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

Autobots roll out!

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Oh no. Is this the fate of everyone who had the misfortune of reading that?

[–] FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (6 children)

Yeaaa.....I feel like this meme would be good if it got rid of the last part. That's just unnecessary.

[–] ProfessorProteus@lemmy.world 26 points 1 month ago

I don't think I could find it, but there's a different, older version of this meme with the same pic. The punchline is indeed the first part of this one, but it was done in a much more subtle way and didn't ruin the joke by spelling it out with "murder instead of suicide."

Shame on whoever stole the joke and then not only told it badly, but ended it with necrophilia.

[–] PhoreTwunny@lemmy.world 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's the punchline, it's just very dark humor

Dark humor is like food. Not everyone gets it.

[–] bstix@feddit.dk 4 points 1 month ago

Someone linked his Wikipedia page elsewhere on this thread. Ofcourse the last part is made up, that's the joke, but the first part is the feel-good meme that made its rounds several years ago.

[–] Kecessa@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 month ago (2 children)

My thought as well, maybe change it to "so it can be an open casket wake" or something

[–] saltesc@lemmy.world 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

The shitpost should be less shitposty?

It'd still work, but that's against the whole point. I mean, you're just proving it worked as designed. That's quality shitposting.

[–] yamanii@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago

This is why you aren't making the jokes.

[–] mEEGal@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

welp, they got me in the first half, not gonna lie.

That's why I'd rather keep the last part

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

SexyLosers tier joke.