Pfft, sucking your own dick is amateur. Real men toss their own salad.
this post was submitted on 14 Oct 2024
708 points (98.8% liked)
Greentext
4227 readers
927 users here now
This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.
Be warned:
- Anon is often crazy.
- Anon is often depressed.
- Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.
If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
Sounds like a qualification for Cirque du Soleil.
try a tenga flip hole.
I've had a couple tenga's but I feel like these are meant to be disposable. Never a flip though, kind of pricey.
some people treat all sexual objects as disposable. protect your heart.
Classmate in 7th grade while warming up for gym class stretched easily that way. One kid made the offhand comment "Hey, you can suck your own dick!" and flexible kid immediately yelled "SHUT UP!". Which told us all he'd done it.
For the curious, I did know someone who said they could do it. We didn't have long conversations about it or anything but he said all you need to know.
"It's more like sucking dick than getting your dick sucked."
Sounds like a win win. Maybe I should work on getting more flexible.
Hey, aim for the moon, if you miss you still hit the stars! Or something.
Just please, please take it slow and stretch a LOT and don't force it, you can seriously maim your back if you force it. There's probably some yoga exercises you can look up online.
Makes perfect sense! Like doing 69. Mouth grabs attention over genitals.
I'm not jealous. You are!
If I could suck my own dick, I wouldn't ever leave the house.
Pairs well with a choking fetish
Anon messed up not removing a couple of ribs beforehand
Adam Anon
I can't believe this old hoax is still being circulated. This goes back pre-internet as one of the first viral memes.
Shhh. It reveals our age.
Press (X) to doubt.
I’m in my mid 30s and heard this rumor in middle school, it’s definitely old. At the time it was supposedly Marilyn Manson who did it.
I was drawing the S before that. Elf on a shelf was before that.
Ok…?
Marilyn Manson removing ribs to suck his own dick isn't even close to the first viral meme. That little guy I posted up there was a viral meme from WWII.
They didn’t say it was “the first.”
They said "one of the first", which is also not even close to true.
The main point they were making is that the meme is particularly old, pre-dating the modern Internet - the dominant medium of memes. As such, you could certainly say, perhaps somewhat hyperbolically, that it’s one of the first. Not sure why some people expect whatever another writes in an internet comment to be 100%, to-the-letter, literally true, when that’s not at all how we use language from day to day.
Not sure why you can't directly address me? I'm the one making the argument. Don't sit in your high horse, "OH well s o m e p e o p le..."
And don't generalize how every one uses language, thank you. I prefer direct, factual speaking, where I don't misattribute or make things up for the sake of hyperbole, otherwise known as lies.
Well, you’re going to have a bad time on the internet, where the vast majority of people aren’t interested in catering their speech to a general audience to your or anyone’s individual preferences. The “general audience” aspect of public forums on the internet is why I’m not directly addressing you - I, nor I doubt many others here, give two shits that using a bit of hyperbole or exaggeration, particularly when making a flippant comment about something as trivial as how old a meme is, gives @three@lemm.ee the ick.
At any rate, I can’t be bothered to take this thread as seriously as you, so I’m going to be disengaging now.
Classic move by someone who just found out how much effort it actually takes to be inclusive. Go ahead, run away, but I don't ever want you to claim you care.
Why are you absurdly antagonistic in a random comment chain, what the fuck
I came across this reading the comments and at first i thought you were doing some kind of pedantic keyboard warrior bit.
Same and I didn't even know who that was. But I was impressed lol
Is that something other men want to do? Even my dog had no interest in it and he was easily flexible enough.
I have tried before whether I could do it, the answer was no, and I don't feel I am missing out on anything.
You shouldn't get your dog to suck your dick, no matter how flexible the dog is.
Yeah, they can't make a vacuum due to their mouth shape, so it's just going to be sloppy with a large risk of puncture. Totally not worth it.
They say it's more like sucking a dick vs getting a bj apparently.
Sounds like a win-win in my book.
load more comments
(2 replies)
Yes. I know peeps and it’s apparently awesome.
load more comments
(7 replies)
Suckin that dick at an egregerious angle
I cackled laughed in a Walmart just now. Can't explain that one lol
I really do this shit
This shit ain't nothing to me man
Back, not neck.
... I'm told.
view more: next ›