Too late
this post was submitted on 20 Sep 2024
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Microblog Memes
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maybe pocket baby
I am literally reading this on my squatty potty (if you don't have one - BUY ONE)
FYI: Defibrillators don't start the heart, they stop it.
The heart doesn't stop in many heart attacks. Instead it just beats erratically and in a way that doesn't pump blood well. Shocking the heart to stop it (what a defib does) causes the nerve cells to "reboot" and start beating regularly again.
Shocking a victim who's heart has stopped is useless and automatic defibrillators won't go off until they've detected the arrhythmia.
Hearty restarty
It's essentially the "have you tried turning it off and back on again" of cardiology.
I blame House MD for this common misconception
Yes, thank you, I'm glad you mentioned it here, it doesn't happen often enough. I mean, it's even in the name, right? Defibrillator gets rid of fibrillation - the erratic beating!
And hippos aren't buoyant.
Well it's that or the Action Comics method.
Alliteration for everyone!
Pooper scooper -> Poopy Scoopy
Perhaps my favorite meme ever
Beans = Farty Starties
Because they give you gas (pooty booty).
And if they went bad, you get booty shooty (diarrhea).
Beans, beans, the musical fruit, the more you eat, the more you toot.
I can only read this in Paul McCartney’s voice…
Gun = Rootie Tootie Point and Shootie
Pointy Shootie
average Australian be like
If they could read they’d be very upset.
I'd have called them chazzwazzers
Walkie-talkie was created by a Canadian engineer Donald Hings.
can't believe they left out cruise missile: zoomy boomy
The lol per pixel ratio of this meme was significantly above the mean
Speedo = Scrotie Totey
Erectile Dysfunction = Teenie Weenie
I am completely on board with this and suggest we amend all the dictionaries immediately.
It's a travesty that they aren't called "Fuzzy Buzzies"
Tractor trailers = big rigs.
Huh, I thought defibrillators were for arrhythmias, but it's also for cardiac arrest.
It should be called Hearty Stoppy. That's what they do. Stop your heart so it can reboot in safe mode.
Yup, and it fucking sucks (better than dying though) to have one used on you.
...now I want to try it. Which is probably unwise.
Call of the void.
Yeah, id probably join you.
Real object names.
Surely Stamps should be called Lickie-Stickie-Posties.
glowy hoppy
Prison Snitch = Snitchie Bitchies get the Stitchies