this post was submitted on 09 Sep 2024
156 points (91.5% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

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3173 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

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9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

cross-posted from: https://lemm.ee/post/41811290

I think the use of this meme format already counts as one

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] paddirn@lemmy.world 53 points 2 months ago

Hello fellow Net-heads. My name is Wilbur Arnofsen, I live on 326 Cherry Lane in Sansquata, Michigan, very pleased to meet you all. I’ve heard great things about the information super highway, but I’ve also heard their may be some… problematic things, things like p**nography. Does anybody know the worst sites that I should be on the lookout for to block my kids from looking at those?

Thanks, Wilbur Arnofsen III

[–] Sendpicsofsandwiches@sh.itjust.works 37 points 2 months ago (1 children)

wwwwwwwwwwwwweewssdewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwhowtodeletetextwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

wwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Sent From My Iphone

[–] SingularEye@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 2 months ago

how did you do that?

[–] radicalautonomy@lemmy.world 35 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

WELCOME TO RADICAL AUTONOMY'S WEBSITE!

This is soon going to be a great website all about me! Click here to see pictures of me and my friends!

[–] HornedMeatBeast@lemmy.world 35 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] Prok@lemmy.world 22 points 2 months ago (1 children)

What did you type? All I see are asterisks

[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 14 points 2 months ago (4 children)
[–] HornedMeatBeast@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I put on my robe and wizard hat.

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[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 32 points 2 months ago (1 children)

A lot of friends have been asking me to fill this out. Delete the answers and repost yours!

What's Your Name? Samantha but my friends call me sam love my girls you know who you are!!!!!

What's your favorite kind of music? i listen to everything except rap and country

Who's your best friend? bree or sarah <3 <3 <3

What's your favorite band? good charlotte

Do you like anyone? maybeeeeeee loll ;)

When is the last time you saw your crush? in study hall today LOL!

[–] Shady_Shiroe@lemmy.world 13 points 2 months ago

Sammy over here listening to death metal

[–] c0smokram3r@midwest.social 26 points 2 months ago (3 children)
[–] deuleb_biezelbob@programming.dev 11 points 2 months ago

Ashley/19F/California

[–] SendMePhotos@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

42/F/WA

... Damn I'm so old that the first two digits have swapped since I have last typed that...

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[–] Tyfud@lemmy.world 25 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Press ALT + F4 to open up the administrator window.

[–] Facebones@reddthat.com 5 points 2 months ago

My car died over covid but my license plate was "I ALTF4" lol

[–] bandwidthcrisis@lemmy.world 24 points 2 months ago (1 children)

HOW DO I TURN OFF CAPS? I THOUGH IT WAS CAPS LOCK BUT IT'S NOT. I EVEN PRESSED IT TWICE JUST TO BE SURE I'D DONE IT.

[–] ProfessorProteus@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

ME TOO! MY BIG BROTHER SAID IT'S CAPS UNLOCK BUT I CAN'T FIND THAT KEY ANYWHERE.

[–] bandwidthcrisis@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

I DON'T THINK THAT THERE IS caps unlock... oh wow i did it, i did it. free T LAST ... OH NO.

[–] Willdrick@lemmy.world 22 points 2 months ago (9 children)
AT
OK
ATDT 555-1013
DIALING
CONNECT 14400

Crap, this is not the BBS I wanted to call... welp, might as well put something on the wall.

Greetings to the older folk on Lemmy!!
:-)
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[–] roboto@feddit.org 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

DON'T DELETE THIS!!! (it scared the crap outta me)

Once there was a a beautiful young girl who lived in a small town just south of Farmersburg. Her parents had to go to town for a while, so they left their daughter home alone, but protected by her dog, which was a very large collie. The parents told the girl to lock all the windows and doors after they had left. And at about 8:00pm the parents went to town. So doing what she was told the girl shut and locked evey window and every door. But there was one window in the basement that would not close completely.

Trying as best as she could she finally got the window shut, but it would not lock. So she left the window, and went back upstairs. But just to make sure that no one could get in, she put the dead-bolt lock on the basment door.

Then she sat down had some dinner and decided to go to sleep for the night. Settling down to sleep at about 12:00 she snuggled up with the dog and fell asleep.

But at one point, she suddenly woke up. She turned and looked at the clock...it was 2:30. She snuggled down again wondering what had woken her.....when she heard a noise. It was a dripping sound. She thought that she had left the water running, and now it was dripping into the drain of her sink. So thinking it was no big deal she decided to go back to sleep.

But she felt nervous so she reached her hand over the edge of her bed, and let the dog lick her hand for reasurance that he would protect her. Again at about 3:45 she woke up hearing drippping. She was slightly angry now but went back to sleep anyway. Again she reached down and let the dog lick her hand. Then she fell back to sleep.

At 6:52 the girl decided that she had had enough...she got up just in time to see her parents were pulling up to the house. "Good,"she thought. "Now somebody can fix the sink...'cause I know I didn't leave it running." She walked to the bathroom and there was the collie dog, skinned and hung up on the curtain rod. The noise she heard was its blood dripping into a puddle on the floor. The girl screamed and ran to her bedroom to get a weapon, incase someone was still in the house.....and there on the floor, next to her bed she saw a small note, written in blood, saying: HUMANS CAN LICK TOO MY BEAUTIFUL.

Now it is time for you to lock all the windows and doors. This letter is the only chain letter that is true. This did happen many years ago, and the man who killed the dog was never caught. If you delete this letter you will suffer the same fate as the girl in the story did, years after the dog was killed. She was raped and killed in the same town and same house as the dog. Do not dismiss this letter, because if you do, a horrible thing will become of you, everyone will soon know your name. But only because it will be the headline of your local newspaper for a long time. It will read... Small Town Murder On The Loose! You can not chance your luck on a chain letter so serious as this. Give up your chance to send this letter to 23 people and you will be giving up your chance to live. You were warned. I hope that I will not see any murder stories in the papers anytime soon. And now I bid you a good day. And one more thing... you only have 23 minutes... sorry.

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56k modem sound intensifies

[–] the_grass_trainer@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago

Bikini pictures google bikini no search for pictures of goddamnit google search for bikini pictures

[–] norimee@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Someone told me to write down my credit card info and my social security here

It's 3711 1111 1111 114 and 911 on the back.
SSN 078-05-1120

Did I do this right?

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[–] salvaria@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 2 months ago (3 children)

5 min ago my lemmy all turned spanish....all the tabs, preferences..etc. I went into preferences and made sure they were checked to english....they were....what is going on? I cant read spanish so I am in need of some help here....i am asking you b/c I cannot find the mod help link b/c I cannot read it.

[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 13 points 2 months ago

recuerdo esto, bien hecho

[–] Obi@sopuli.xyz 13 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Simplemente vaya a su página de preferencias y busque la opción de idioma apropiado.

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[–] bigkahuna1986@lemmy.ml 6 points 2 months ago

Creo que puedes cambiar eso en la configuración de idioma.

[–] psilotop@lemmy.world 13 points 2 months ago
[–] abbadon420@lemm.ee 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)
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[–] WereCat@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)
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[–] roboto@feddit.org 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Boobs

Lady boobs

Naked lady boob

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[–] martinbasic@lemmy.world 11 points 2 months ago
<marquee>Welcome to my website</marquee>
[–] Jean_le_Flambeur@discuss.tchncs.de 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You look very handsome in that picture with you little shirt young man!

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[–] jiberish@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago

I received a chain e-mail saying that If I mail the person who sent me this $1 and forward the e-mail to all my entire contact list, I will be a millionaire. There are hundreds of email addresses in the body of this email from all the forwards that have happened before it was forwarded to me. How cool! Unrelated: how are all these spammers getting my email address? I only gave it to all my friends and family. And my friends/family only send me cool chain emails and funny jokes. e-mail is a new technology, so surly they will fix this spam problem by the year 2000.

[–] merari42@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Well, here we go again! The internet was supposed to be freedom, but now it's just a playground for Big Brother and corporate greed. Y'all see this Y2K “bug”? IT’S NOT A BUG, it’s a SCAM to reset everything and put us under CONTROL! Bill Gates, Al Gore, ALL of ‘em are in on it. Soon, you won’t be able to load a page without the Feds watching you.

Wake UP, people! You think AOL and Micro$oft care about "innovation"? LOL. It’s all about taking over! AOL’s already bought up Netscape! What’s next, paying to send an email? Think your ICQ is private? LOL, it’s government spyware!

And don’t get me started on the mods here. I see you silencing REAL posts about how the UN is behind all this. Keep banning me, I’ll be back! They wanna control speech before the big RESET. Mark my words, the internet will be a corporate mall by 2005, and y’all will pay just to read THIS.

P.S. If this post vanishes, you know why. I SEE YOU, MODS!

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[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago (2 children)
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[–] magnetosphere@fedia.io 8 points 2 months ago

Add me to your Friends list so we can talk about cool stuff!

[–] ThePyroPython@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape.

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[–] almost1337@lemm.ee 8 points 2 months ago

Welcome! You've got mail!

[–] random_character_a@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Badger badger badger mushroom mushroom

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[–] loaExMachina@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Hello world! Where is the website with all the funny image? And where's the one where you learn how to be a super hacker?

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[–] Zementid@feddit.nl 7 points 2 months ago

Google.com TiddiesBigtiddieshowtogoogle Google ....

[–] charonn0@startrek.website 7 points 2 months ago (2 children)
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[–] CurlyWurlies4All@slrpnk.net 7 points 2 months ago

Digimon.com Neopets.com Furrypets.com Furries.com Hotfurriesforum.com Deletemyhistory.com

[–] FiniteLooper@lemm.ee 6 points 2 months ago

Who is Jeeves and why would I ask him instead of my parents?

[–] Tixanou@lemm.ee 6 points 2 months ago (3 children)
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[–] RacerX@lemm.ee 6 points 2 months ago

ReeeeeeeeeBONGghnugGHunGGhughngcrrrrrrrrrrshhhhh

[–] roboto@feddit.org 5 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Funy picture

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