this post was submitted on 21 Aug 2024
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No Stupid Questions

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[–] partial_accumen@lemmy.world 23 points 2 months ago (1 children)

A person's actions to being a good person is much more important that a person's thoughts. The most well meaning inactive person may be at best a neutral impact on the world, while the most sinister villain of internal thought that acts only altruistically would be considered a hero.

[–] BearOfaTime@lemm.ee 7 points 2 months ago

Great examples.

Especially since we're all a hodgepodge of good/bad will - the challenge for anyone is to keep the crap inside as much as possible, and focus on doing the good.

[–] MolochAlter@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago

Of course, just because there's an audience doesn't mean you're pandering to it.

Fundamentally, integrity is an internal concept.

Only you can know if you have it, because only you can truly know your motivations.

As long as your moral choices are truly based on your own principles and you would do the same regardless of observation, then you have integrity.

External factors can only give you reasons to pretend you have integrity, but they can't prevent you genuinely having it.

[–] BackOnMyBS@lemmy.autism.place 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

This strikes me the same as saying, "No matter what I do or say to myself, I feel deeply in my soul that I am a bad/flawed person."

https://www.liberationhealingseattle.com/blog-trauma-therapist/ptsd-core-beliefs-trauma-survivors

https://www.aconsciousrethink.com/12386/im-a-bad-person/

[–] Huckledebuck@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

I think this is what i was looking for. Thank you!

[–] BackOnMyBS@lemmy.autism.place 1 points 2 months ago

You're welcome! I also experience that, so I noticed it intuitively. Lately, I've been trying to navigate it myself by realizing that sometimes I say lies just to prove it right. Like, I will confess to intentions I didn't have or even behaviors I didn't commit just so people can think that. Like, I might go somewhere with a friend and accidentally forget my wallet. When it comes time to pay for something sporadic, I admit that I left my wallet at home to not have to pay. Or, I might admit to stealing something I payed for. I don't know why I do it, but I think it's related to the belief that I'm a bad person and want others to think that because it would be validating. It also gives the impression that I'm sneaky, so it serves as a warning for people to not try shady crap with me. I know it's not healthy and don't like that I do that, so I'm trying to work on it. I think the root cause is the core belief that I'm bad and don't deserve love. I'm freaking crazy lol...aww 🙁

[–] norimee@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

If you feel like you are always watched, you might want to check in with a psychiatrist. In all seriousness.

[–] Doxin@pawb.social 1 points 2 months ago

I feel like OP is referring to religious folks believing God is always watching.

Dunno if that really invalidates your comment though.

[–] Huckledebuck@sh.itjust.works 5 points 2 months ago (4 children)

To me, being a good person extends to doing good when no one is watching. Can this be done if you feel like you're always being watched?

[–] iiGxC@slrpnk.net 14 points 2 months ago

Does it matter if someone has integrity if they always do the right thing?

[–] RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Whether a person thinks they are being watched or nor is irrelevant. Either they are or they aren't, and if they think they always are being watched, then it is safe to assume that person has integrity because they always act with integrity whether someone is actually watching them or not.

[–] Huckledebuck@sh.itjust.works -1 points 2 months ago (2 children)

But if you always feel like your being watched then you can never know what you would choose to do if you didn't have that feeling.

[–] RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

If you always feel like you are being watched then it doesnt matter what you would do if nobody was watching. Youre going to act the same as you always do, and if that is acting with integrity then that won't change.

[–] BearOfaTime@lemm.ee 1 points 2 months ago

Speak for yourself.

This is why "know yourself" is in pretty much any philosophical/ethical/moral framework.

[–] SolOrion@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

That's kind of arbitrary, isn't it?

To me, being a good person extends to doing good while hopping on one leg.

That's ridiculous, right? That's obviously a definition of 'good' I'm creating, and choosing to impose on myself. Which is exactly what you're doing. Yours is just less ridiculous.

[–] BearOfaTime@lemm.ee 0 points 2 months ago

You're assuming intent.

[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 3 points 2 months ago

This is just religion right

[–] the_toast_is_gone@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

Integrity isn't just about doing the right thing when nobody's watching; it's also about being mindful of the consequences of your actions. Heck, I'd say that's the more important side. You might start dumping chemicals into the water without treatment because it's cheaper and there's technically no laws against it. But you're still going to be physically responsible when everyone who lives there starts miscarrying every single pregnancy and the town is abandoned because of your misdeeds.

[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)