Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

Anon is often crazy.
Anon is often depressed.
Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works

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Anon appears in a viral tiktok (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 3 months ago by Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works to c/greentext@sh.itjust.works

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[–] Etterra@lemmy.world 92 points 3 months ago

Well dating somebody who uses TikTok was your first mistake.

[–] Gork@lemm.ee 76 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Mr. Feast sounds like an awesome name tbh

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 months ago

Certainly better than Fancy Feast.

[–] sazey@lemmy.world 51 points 3 months ago (1 children)

anon didn't really expose himself to be fair

[–] turtlepower@lemm.ee 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Just because he didn't spread his asshole, doesn't mean he wasn't exposed.

[–] Fal@yiffit.net 21 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I think the point was he didn't expose HIMSELF

[–] Localhorst86@feddit.org 40 points 3 months ago

What's so bad about being a personality hire?

I know I am ugly as fuck and not rich, so if someone were to be with me, because of my personality, i'd consider this a win.

[–] Alexstarfire@lemmy.world 30 points 3 months ago (1 children)

If true, this shouldn't be all that hard to find.

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It's 4chan, it's not real.

[–] Alexstarfire@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago

The infamous hacker?

[–] MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 19 points 3 months ago

I think I see what really happened here...

Anon finished up his Twitch stream when he happens to notice that the Looney Tunes where Bugs Bunny dresses up like a girl rabbit is on.

Becoming highly aroused by Bugs perky bosoms, he decides to pleasure himself with great haste.

After bringing himself to a shameful completion, he suddenly notices that his webcam is still on, and all of Twitch is now talking about him and sharing video clips.

Thinking swiftly he blames the whole thing on his "girlfriend" stating that he's told her 1000 times not to use his webcam for her TikTok account.

He then informs his traumatized and shell shocked audience that he is going to give her a serious talking to right now then ends the stream.

Anon then proceeds to shout at a rather moist and somewhat odoriferous anime body pillow that he calls his "waifu".

Anon then takes to 4Chan to spin the yarn and get condolences from his like minded peers.

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I know I am only there to look pretty on her arm and I’m ok with that.

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 months ago

I don't even need to look pretty, I just want to be on her arm.