this post was submitted on 21 Jun 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] tenchiken@lemmy.dbzer0.com 80 points 5 months ago (2 children)

"your hot wife obviously is suffering from sexy demons. I need to use my specialized equipment to vigorously purge them from her, once each evening, and sometimes just after lunch..."

[–] AFKBRBChocolate@lemmy.world 61 points 5 months ago (3 children)

That sounds far fetched until you remember that they diagnosed women with hysteria and treated them by giving them orgasms. When the vibrator was invented to treat muscle pain much later, doctors latched onto them for treating hysteria to give their hands a break.

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 43 points 5 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

Absolutely. Hystéra is Greek for uterus. Hysteria, or the “roaming uteri” theory was a successor to Plato’s theory of hysterical suffocation. They believed that the uterus could migrate around the body, placing pressure on internal organs. It’s like gynecological fan fiction.

[–] roguetrick@lemmy.world 23 points 5 months ago

When pregnant that's a pretty good explanation of what it does though. Uterus just tells everybody up to the diaphragm to get outta the fucking way.

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 2 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Duh. Uterus is Latin. Thanks. I’ll edit for clarity.

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I had to look it up myself lol

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

I couldn’t remember the spelling of the Greek word, so I looked it up yesterday for that comment. I searched “Greek word for uterus” and then wrote Latin in the comment like a dingus.

Not only was Plato Greek, but Latin words that end in “us” are pluralized with an “i.” It was all right there mocking me. Lol

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Wasn't at all mocking! It wasn't even me who caught it. My GF was like "Hmmm, thats too internet-only-fact" and looked it up. Just passing it along cause I sure as shit didn't know lol

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

No worries! I didn’t take it as such. I meant the comment itself was mocking me. I knew better.

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Oh, yeah, that feeling sure is fun... especially when it catches a hyperfixation wave.

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Have you been talking to my therapist? Lol

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 4 months ago (1 children)

No we just gone so crazy that you don't even remember I'm you buddy! Try and remember on Wednesday, it's embarrassing when we don't check the mirror on our way out the door, can't have that happening again.

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 2 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Not after that Hoffstadtler presentation mishap, no.

You’re fun. I hope you and your girlfriend have a great weekend!

Lol thanks! I feel the same. Enjoy what's left of your weekend too!

[–] Dadifer@lemmy.world 8 points 5 months ago

I think that makes up for a lot of bad things that were done.

[–] KillingAndKindess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] AFKBRBChocolate@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago (2 children)

I think you responded to the wrong comment

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 2 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Is your username a modem interpretation of OMGWTFBBQ?

[–] AFKBRBChocolate@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago

I'm not sure I've seen that one, but it does seem to have the same vibe.

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[–] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 8 points 4 months ago (3 children)

that still exists today in Turkey

[–] BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works 4 points 4 months ago

Well in that case

Merhaba, bugün doktorunuz olacağım. Lütfen eteğinizi kaldırın, iç çamaşırınızı çıkarın ve her zamanki pozisyonu alın.

[–] PlexSheep@infosec.pub 1 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Can you tell us more? It sounds legitimately interesting.

[–] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 2 points 4 months ago

well your regular small scale religious cult leader being the main point of contact for every health concern (because they set up shop in a very rural area with a lot of religious conservatism and limited health care). People go to them for all sorts of reasons and when you are a female the general answer is you are infested with demons I can help you personally in my bedroom. It is especially ironic when they go to this person because a female cant get pregnant and then voilà!

[–] boatsnhos931@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago

Gobble gobble

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 44 points 5 months ago

The only logical solution is for me to blow pipe tobacco smoke in your butthole.

[–] DudeImMacGyver@sh.itjust.works 39 points 4 months ago (2 children)

"You got hysteria lady, time for a finger blasting session."

[–] mrgreyeyes@feddit.nl 9 points 4 months ago (3 children)

They used a vibrator because they did not want to get tired.

[–] modus@lemmy.world 2 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I've never heard that term for an intern.

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[–] MTK@lemmy.world 26 points 4 months ago

Lol, you can still do that, just call it "the truth that big pharma doesn't want you to know"

[–] sangriaferret@sh.itjust.works 21 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Credit to John Mulaney for this joke

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[–] variants@possumpat.io 13 points 5 months ago

Sadly you could still do this today and charge insurance in the US as long as people don't care you're charging their insurance.

[–] Theharpyeagle@lemmy.world 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Something about the phrasing "you should do a lot of cocaine about it" really tickles me. I wonder what you call breaking grammar rules for humor like that.

[–] Crikeste@lemm.ee 1 points 4 months ago

You’ve piqued my interest and now I want to know, too!

[–] snausagesinablanket@lemmy.world 10 points 5 months ago

Not to leave out covering your forehead in leeches to suck out evil.

[–] sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip 9 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

You've got a horrible infection and a fever?

I'll be right over to slit your veins and let all the bad blood out.

(In fairness I think bloodletting was mostly out of practice by the time actual telephones existed, but lol joke)

Maybe a more time period accurate one would be:

Your foot hurts? You think its from a badly fit shoe. Ok. Ok. Come over tomorrow and we will stick your foot into the wildly overpowered and unshielded x ray scope and we'll see what can be done.

[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 7 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Sadly (or not), they werent making shit up, they actually believed what they said

[–] GladiusB@lemmy.world 4 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 4 points 4 months ago

Yep. Thats a demographic that has gotten a whole lot more exposure lately

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)

There is a ghoti swimming in your veins

[–] LoreleiSankTheShip@lemmy.ml 3 points 4 months ago

Do you have a ghoti-ing licence for that joke? Wild ghoti must be preserved, you know!

[–] lemmy_nightmare@sh.itjust.works 2 points 4 months ago

Let’s not forget, keeping your ear to an ample bosom “listening” for heart sounds.

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