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Humans ARE apes. Also fish. Fuck paraphyletic groups.
A paraphyletic group is a group of any size and systematic rank that originated from a single common ancestor, but does not – as opposed to a monophyletic group – contain all descendants from this ancestor. The ancestral species of this group is thus also the ancestor of one or more other groups
https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/biochemistry-genetics-and-molecular-biology/paraphyly
Yeah. Fuck 'em.
We are all bacteria on this blessed day.
Not really, we're eukaryotes. We share a common (unknown) ancestor, but bacteria split off into their own monophyletic group I'm pretty sure.