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Google to the rescue! Keep in mind, it is common for people to refer to sex when talking about gender as to not confuse it with "Sex"'s more sexual definition. It''d be a lil weird to say the "Sex Reveal Party". But when comparing the two, they have two different dennotative meanings.
Anywho, from Google's Dictionary:
gen·der
noun
noun: gender; plural noun: genders
the male sex or the female sex, especially when considered with reference to social and cultural differences rather than biological ones, or one of a range of other identities that do not correspond to established ideas of male and female.
"the singer has opted to keep the names and genders of her twins private"
members of a particular gender considered as a group.
"social interaction between the genders"
the fact or condition of belonging to or identifying as having a particular gender.
"video ads will target users based only on age and gender"
Dancing around the word and repeating it a bunch is not defining. Try something better than Google. Tell me what it is that has you convinced there's some kind of meaning in the terms.
Is that definition not supporting your points though? It defines gender as mostly a social construct, which imo reinforces the fact that it's made up and not a tangible thing anyway.
Sometimes biological sex matters (e.g. as medical info for a doctor to understand) but other than that it's connected to gender in name only, based on made-up social rules.
There's loads of totally made up stuff that I can put a hard definition on. Gender? Absolutely nothing. Gender roles are bad and genitalia doesn't define them, so what does? Absolutely goddamn nothing. Math is intangible and made up, but very clearly and functionally defined. Gender? Nothing. Define one. I'm still waiting. You've got nothing.