this post was submitted on 18 May 2024
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United States | News & Politics

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[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 129 points 4 months ago (6 children)

As a Jew so Jewy that I moderate c/Jewish, I can tell you for a fact that I personally use the mind control setting on my space laser to make Nick Fuentes think about sucking cock all day.

[–] PugJesus@lemmy.world 36 points 4 months ago

Thank you for your service

[–] Voroxpete@sh.itjust.works 29 points 4 months ago

You're doing Yahweh's work.

[–] dumbass@leminal.space 24 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Dude I think you got the coordinates wrong, you hit me instead.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 27 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] dumbass@leminal.space 7 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

S'all good, maybe swing it past again next week, you know for calibration...

[–] Hadriscus@lemm.ee 20 points 4 months ago (1 children)

dang, I gotta seriously reconsider not being jewish. All these perks sure seem worth the trouble

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 11 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Warning: You do have to cut off the tip of your penis.

[–] Dkarma@lemmy.world 12 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 8 points 4 months ago

Now that's commitment. At least it was done to me when I was a baby so I don't remember it.

[–] Hadriscus@lemm.ee 2 points 4 months ago

My mil asked me to do that one. Never saw her again

[–] NOT_RICK@lemmy.world 16 points 4 months ago

How many liters of children’s blood does that take?

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 15 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Those little hats are mind control transmitters, aren't they?

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 10 points 4 months ago

Please. They're called beanies and some come with propellers.

(If I had a dollar for every time some idiot called a yarmulke a beanie...)