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What is a gender neutral replacement for man, guys, buddy, etc? (lemmy.ca)

submitted 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) by MajorMajormajormajor@lemmy.ca to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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So I've realized that in conversations I'll use traditional terms for men as general terms for all genders, both singularly and for groups. I always mean it well, but I've been thinking that it's not as inclusive to women/trans people.

For example I would say:

"What's up guys?" "How's it going man?" "Good job, my dude!” etc.

Replacing these terms with person, people, etc sounds awkward. Y'all works but sounds very southern US (nowhere near where I am located) so it sounds out of place.

So what are some better options?

Edit: thanks for all the answers peoples, I appreciate the honest ones and some of the funny ones.

The simplest approach is to just drop the usage of guys, man, etc. Folks for groups and mate for singular appeal to me when I do want to add one in between friends.

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[–] Jolteon@lemmy.zip 15 points 8 months ago (1 children)

There's a very big difference between "dude", referring to someone you're talking to, and "a dude", referring to someone you were talking about.

[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone -2 points 8 months ago (3 children)

Not to me there isn't...

[–] gofsckyourself@lemmy.world 13 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

It's like the difference between "my shit", "your shit", and "that shit". You're not actually referring to your own things as feces, or calling it "shitty". It's just your shit. As in "Don't touch my shit". But when you're referring to someone else's shit as "your shit" or "that shit" it's more derogatory. Like, "clean up that shit" or "get your shit out of here".

The context changes "shit" from derogatory to neutral. Similarly, "dude" can be both gender specific and neutral depending on context.

Note that people are still allowed to prefer not to be referred to as "dude", but it's a gender neutral term in many contexts nonetheless.

[–] teawrecks@sopuli.xyz 4 points 8 months ago

In the '60s, I made love to many, many women, often outdoors, in the mud and the rain, and it's possible a man slipped in. There would be no way of knowing.

[–] Matriks404@lemmy.world -2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Then educate yourself. See definitions 1 and 2 for noun and definition for interjection.