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Welcome to the fediverse, where you are morally complicit in the crimes of your admins!
But yeah, personally I think the way instances and defederation are handled in Mastodon/Lemmy is one of the big problems with it at the moment. Depending on what instance you are on, you'll get "locked out" of certain communities and from certain people, and there's generally very little accountability and transparency about it.
For example, lemmy.ml blocks one of the two furry instances, so you'll have less comments from furries. It's also apparently becoming more hardcore tankie, so other instances may start blocking it themselves.
I like to think that I'm above all that and don't discriminate based on instance, but there's one instance out there that has done heinous things and I'm not sure I could remain impartial towards people who stay on it...