this post was submitted on 20 Jan 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 13 points 9 months ago (2 children)

lord of the rings but gandalf has a trebuchet and mt. doom is within 300m

[–] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 10 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

Lord of the Rings but Frodo has an assault rifle.

[–] MissJinx@lemmy.world 9 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Frodo is a little bitch, give it to Sam

[–] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 6 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (4 children)

Lord of the Rings but Sam has an assault rifle... and an armored SUV

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 4 points 9 months ago

"Time to TRIM and MOW DOWN Mordor's orcish hordes!" - Samwise "The Gardener" Gamgee

[–] MissJinx@lemmy.world 2 points 9 months ago

I would watch this movie!

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

armored cars really only make sense for open areas, what they should have is 6-wheeled ATVs like finnish military messengers have.

[–] Sotuanduso@lemm.ee 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)
  1. They can outrun the black riders.
  2. The black riders alert the witch-king.
  3. They can't outrun the fellbeast.

So yeah, pretty short. But if they are able to maintain stealth, then:

  1. They get stopped at Caradhras by bad weather anyways.
  2. They go through Rohan instead of Moria (otherwise they'd have to abandon the SUV or be very dangerous.)
  3. They outrun any of the cavalry that might try to stop them.
  4. They get through Minas Tirith months before the battle, no biggie.
  5. They get stumped at the Black Gate.
[–] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 9 months ago
  1. They call in Gandalf in his A10 Thunderbolt II (because the eagles didn't have a 30mm GAU-8 Avenger). Drops a paveway on the Black Gate and dumps 1,174 30mm slugs and a few clusters of hydra 70mm rockets into the horde.
[–] Shapillon@lemmy.world 5 points 9 months ago

Frodo is the sentient equivalent of tying the ring to a snail.

Jokes aside he is supposed to be exceptionally resilient to its corruption.

[–] Wogi@lemmy.world 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I'm kinda sad it's a normal size rifle. He's a Hobbit it should be huge

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 9 months ago

it was specially comissioned

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 4 points 9 months ago

ONE SHOT TWO KILLS MOTHERFUCKER!

https://youtu.be/p1-ExbgKUUI