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My wife has six home screens each with a random selection of apps and widgets. I feel like there would be more order if they were just in the position they landed when she installed them. She never clears notifications or closes browser tabs. I feel anxious whenever I use her phone to do anything.

I am this person too. I open every app I use by opening the full list and scrolling. If it's one I use regularly I remember where it is via muscle memory... until I (un)install another app and it's shifted over by 1. My notifications are full of weeks-old Discord notifications I never gave a shit about in the first place, SMS messages about prescriptions I've already picked up, and beneath the "important" section there's a horrific underbelly of junk emails, random ads from other apps, system notifications, news, duplicated emails across Gmail and Outlook, etc etc etc...

I'm fairly techy and know these are easily solvable things, but I'm pretty unorganized irl with a healthy dose of ADHD too so these habits take some effort and time to build. I've poked at disabling notification categories per app and organizing my app shelf but I don't stick with it much. Sometimes it's unclear what notifications are in which categories, and apps update and add notifications all the time that I then have to go in and disable again. I can organize my apps on my screen, but muscle memory works "good enough" to the point that I forget to use the organized screen and just dive into All Apps again.