this post was submitted on 04 Aug 2023
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Personal background: I strongly feel just about everyone grows up and has something shitty about them. I know growing up I definitely thought and said some less-than-ideal jokes about women, minorities, etc. And while some of that was the proverbial 'the times', and some was growing up in a sheltered hyper Christian southern American conservative situation, I regret my actions and am happy I grew past that. And I do think people, especially younger, can grow past their shittiness, especially with the help of others, which was true for me too... When I got my first W2 job a superior I looked up to helped mold me into a better person by calling me out on things and modeling a better behavior.

Current situation: I'm now the supervisor position, have been for a decade (retail is a trap) and I've taken that to heart, calling out jokes that aren't funny, etc. But recently we hired a new kid who acts really incel-ish, and who apparently has attached himself to me instantly. I've had moderate success so far just telling him his 'lol women dumb' jokes aren't funny, and modeling how working with women is... normal? Anyways, I don't wanna screw this up so do y'all have any suggestions for me to help keep him from going down an unfortunate path? I know at the end of the day I'm not responsible for others' routes in life, but I feel we should all do our parts.

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[–] fuzzywolf23@beehaw.org 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You should really have the decency to contemplate why a woman would not want that before you tell her she's wrong for not wanting it.

[–] mojo@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Don't know why you think I didn't. I work with people and have a lot of girl friends. I know very well how they think and empathize well. I'm responding to a random username who's likely perpetually online so I don't exactly value their opinion.

You also have no idea who I am or my experiences before you assume I'm wrong, just like you say I am doing to them.

[–] fuzzywolf23@beehaw.org 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

All I know about you is this conversation, and your response here sounds a lot like "I'm not sexist, I have women friends".

[–] mojo@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Wow now I'm apparently sexist for disagreeing with you. Maybe you should have the decency to contemplate why anyone claiming to be female online must be automatically right. That's pretty sexist to tie truth to gender. You know literally nothing about me, so don't draw any conclusions.

[–] Primarily0617@kbin.social 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Maybe you should have the decency to contemplate why anyone claiming to be female online must be automatically right. That’s pretty sexist to tie truth to gender. You know literally nothing about me, so don’t draw any conclusions.

what the fuck are you talking about

you said a dumb thing online and people are calling you out on it

there's nothing more to it than that

[–] mojo@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Saying someone should talk to someone isn't dumb shit. The amount of mental gymnastics here is astounding.

[–] Primarily0617@kbin.social 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

my sweet baby boyo please stop doing backflips to try and frame this as if you're the normal one just to protect your ego

think of somebody in your life that you wouldn't want to have an extended conversation with

there's obviously somebody, because everybody has somebody

now imagine if a third party advised that somebody to deliberately try to have a painfully extended conversation with you

would you be happy with that third party?