Asklemmy

I somewhat feel like I'm being addressed here. I can only speak for myself but I'd agree, that this is more like being myself. Yet things/reactions that happened in my childhood/youth are ingrained so deep in my brain, that barriers where formed and the true self is somewhere in there.

Drinking partly breaks down those barriers. Good friends I had for a few years now also helped with this, so around them it became easier being "myself".

I knew a guy who was a very outspoken but peaceful vegan, didn't want to harm anything. Animal rights activist. Super nice guy, when sober.

But he also had a drinking problem, and totally flipped when he drank, you could almost see the switch happen in a few seconds when he was at 4-5 beers. His drunk personality was angry, paranoid, quarreling and violent, and he would often get blackout drunk and get into fights and whatnot. Got himself banned from several bars.

I didn't know him well, but he probably had some trauma/bad shit in his life. He never talked about his family, except his grandmother who apparently had raised him, more or less.

As a shy person, I hope that drunk me isn't the true me. That guy was an asshole

When I still drank I was very much like this! It's not that I actively make a point to "suppress" my personality when I'm sober, it's more like when I would drink every thought that popped into my head suddenly seemed like a great idea lol

If I had to put a name to this phenomenon, I'd say drinking just turns off the common sense filter in my brain

Yeah it's probably the case. The alcohol sheds their filters and social reservations that other people don't have at all in the first place. At least I feel like that when I drink. I don't do parties without a few drinks for that reason.

Social anxiety is a bitch but a little bit of booze washes that little crippling demon away.