Football / Soccer / Calcio / Futebol / Fußball

no, if i wait too long i have to waddle to the toilet or my street will hear my farts and possibly more

yep I don't know if there's a good clip of it but last season Waldemar Anton had to do this. To add to the situation our stadium is (still) being renovated so the tunnel is at a corner of the pitch and he plays central defender so he just ran over almost the full pitch out of nothing.
Also our home jerseys are mostly white.

There was once I was doing a beep test in school. I was rather fit, and was able to stay in the test until I was one of the last few left. That also meant that I was pretty drained at that point.

However, when one's got to go, one's got to go. I bolted out of there at what was probably my personal best in 100m up till that point straight to the throne.

Well sometimes if you run you'll relax the muscles and release it all, gotta have that super focus.

As someone who is probably one of the top global experts on shitting yourself, having suffered from an a degeneration of parts of my intestine causing me to shit at rapid speed with warning times ranging from zero to one minute and this to shit myself at least once a week for two years, sometimes you walk and sometimes you run.

It depends on what’s going on internally when the shit strikes, sometimes legging it will trigger sphincter release but sometimes it won’t.

Eric Dier knows

Funnily enough, that happened to a player from Stuttgart not too long ago

He didn't do the walk

Gary linekar entered the chat

Tbf your best bet is to walk off, doesn’t arouse suspicion and doesn’t force any unintentional pressure that may cause a tragic explosion