Asklemmy

48191 readers

802 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

Open-ended question
Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

Lemmyverse: community search
sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
!lemmy411@lemmy.ca: a community for finding communities

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~

founded 6 years ago

MODERATORS

[serious] What survival reflexes of your own experience are hard for you to get rid of? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 11 hours ago by Merlu@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

13 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Either from abusive parents, toxic relationships, short or long term bullying or any other kind of traumatic past that gave you some survival reflexes that are not longer relevant but are hard for you to get rid of.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] PattyP@lemm.ee 6 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago)

I refuse to say anything that creates any unnecessary expectations of me. If asked whether I know something I will always downplay my knowledge. If asked whether I’m interested in something I will always downplay my interest. If asked whether I can commit to something I will always say something to the effect of “I’ll think about it” rather than yes or no.

I would like to be more open and easygoing but it’s hard to do. I would rather people expect little of me and be surprised than expect a lot and be disappointed. As I have gotten older I’ve started to suspect that this is more like building a wall between myself and the world than I’d like to admit.