this post was submitted on 02 Apr 2025
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I just got divorced at 30 after 7 years and I'm probably not going to get involved with a woman again. I'm not interested in having kids because the world is ending so it's essentially a no win situation unless someone can change my mind on this.
Had a crush on one of my friends for years and she wasn't interested even when I got divorced. Till I bought my house and now she wants in on my life.
I'm not saying all women are bad but I just don't see the risk being worth it. My ex wife ruined my life after many years of happiness.
There are a lot of positives being in a relationship but way more negatives. I'm just happier alone.
My wife of 20 years just suddenly (to me anyway) decided she wants a divorce. I was 30 when we got married. Your life is just beginning. Don't waste it feeling sorry for yourself.
Yeah it need therapy. It was the loss of so many friends that really hurt me.
don't bet everything on one card. never ever do that. i learned that very early on.
Wholeheartedly agree on not having kids, but a vasectomy will take that off your plate.
Relationships are tough, but I'd at least keep an open mind.
I'm hard pressed to point to any ten-year period in which some number of Doomers did not insist The World Is Ending.
Like, take your pick of any ten-year span during the Cold War. That butted right up against the OG World Wars, with a Great Depression breather. Before that you had plagues, famines, and economic crashes that shat all over '08 and COVID.
Westoids live in the wealthiest, easiest, most affluent era of human history. Then someone points out "hey, eating burger every day isn't sustainable" and they conclude the world is over.
decades ago, houses were affordable, college was cheap, Americans weren't crushed under mountains of dischargeable student debt, wealth disparity and effective wages were far better, and we had a far more functional political system.
I can't think of much that hasn't gone downhill since 2016. the world isn't ending, but it's ahistoric to claim that history is the steady march of progress. dark ages happen. empires decline. democracies wither.
America is in decline, yes, but all of those things that america is losing, other countries are gaining. Most countries in the world got better and are still getting better. The first world/america is getting worse, but, as you said, it is just part of the cycle. The world is not ending because US is going downhill.
I agree with the sentiment as to the futility of the doomer/nihilist mindset, being a reformed (or rather, being in the process of reforming) doomer nihilist myself, I know the call of the void all to well. However...
It's not just the USA declining - it's really everywhere. Call it whatever you want, late-stage capitalism, the rise of the techbroligarchy and fascism-adjacent currents, etc...
But there's stuff going on. It's harder to get a job, harder to get an education, harder to earn a living wage, harder to get ahead in general. And it's everywhere.
Yes, these are troubling times for many places since these fascists seem to wal together whenever they show up. But I see a much sharper decline in freedom in the last 10 years. Even so, let's look at other numbers I'll use Brazil as an example: poverty reduce from 68% in 1970 to 10%. There were 450.000 thousand university students in 1970, now 8.4 million. 28% of houses had access to sanitation in 1970, now it is almost 80%.
This improvement happened and is still happening all around the world. We save so many kids lives that we overpopulated the world. We just have to be careful now to not let the assholes undo this
For Middle Income White People in Certain States
But we also had the hanging threat of nuclear war, leaded gasoline in the air and painted all over the walls, Satanic Panic, an AIDS epidemic killing millions of people, several large market crashes that deindustrializee the Midwest, and $7/gal, and a Global War on Terror.
None of this was indicative of better economics or a functional political system.
mRNA technology premiering on the eve of a killer pandemic leaps to mind.
that's fair. progress in medicine more generally has been good. we've started curing fatal genetic disorders, we found the cause of multiple sclerosis, there's a new antipsychotic with a novel MoA for the first time since chlorpromazine..
Obama, Reagan, Bush and Clinton weren't fascists. even Trump wasn't a fully-fledged fascist in his first term. he is now, and what's happening to the Federal Government is unprecedented.
look, I know the Weimar Republic had its problems, but you can't claim Hitler was just more of the same. so it is with the US in 2025.
Obama and Clinton were neoliberal to their bones, which meant lots of Realpolitik and backroom handshake deals with fascists in order to drive down the bargaining power of labor and transfer enormous volumes of wealth to business aristocrats. Whatever you might say of their methods, the consequences of their militarism abroad and their austerity economics at home was a steady rise in global fascist tendancy.
Meanwhile, if Reagan and Bush weren't strictly qualified as fascists, they ran as close up to the line as they could get. Religious demagogues who leveraged a business media vomiting up disinformation and race panic to cultivate a white nationalist base of support and overthrow basic democratic institutions at home and abroad. The Brooks Brothers Riot was a coup in every way that mattered. Iran-Contra involved attempts at the illegal overthrow of multiple governments. Extremely fascist.
The German state was doing a holocaust well before The Weimar Republic. They were just doing it to brown people in Africa, rather than white people in Eastern Europe.
Shark Island concentration camp
This is more than just "Pobody's Nerfect". It's marginalized because it happened to people that modern western pop-historians don't like to talk about on The History Channel or during NPR Story Hour. But it is absolutely fascism.
The invasion of Iraq was Fascism. The invasion of Grenada and the overthrow of governments in Chile and Honduras and Brazil and Argentina was Fascism. The constant feeding of racial resentment and inflaming of conspiracy theory among Florida Cuban ex-pats is fascism. The racial hysteria at the US/Mexico border is fascism.
Trump didn't invent any of this.
Go outside, there are no bugs. We've lost nearly all biodiversity. It's over bud.
I drove from Victoria BC to Fairbanks AK three years ago without washing my windshield.
My neighborhood is alive with cicadas every night and there's no shortage of mosquitoes biting.
I'm inside the Houston loop, too. Not out in the boonies. Spiderwebs in my garage. Toads in my drainage ditch. I assume they're eating something.
That's pretty normal in the winter. Try it again after a big rainstorm.
Was June 2021
You want bugs? Drive through Florida.
I'm happy to report there are still plenty of bugs outside the US. So by your evidence at the very worst, just the US is ending :)
I'm in British Columbia
Be honest though when is the last time you've seen a butterfly?
Legitimately in the last two weeks, I forget which day specifically it was. But admittedly that was fairly unusually. But just yesterday I was sitting outside and saw a couple bees, and it is only the start of spring
You didn't get bugs on your windshield so now you're be forever alone? You're just catastrophizing. This is literally just baby stepping from a silly premise to a wild conclusion.
Look, calling yourself undateable is always a self fulfilling prophecy. You have to know on some level that it's still possible if you put in the effort right? There are TONS of childless single women out there.
I'm alone by choice as I explained in my original comment. What don't you understand?
I already had a childless marriage which resulted in me losing half my wealth and most of my friends.
And yes the lack of bugs means that the entire ecosystem is dying. It's kind of a big deal
I imagine you will continue to get disliked and I will as well, but the world isn't over and it's not going to end for a long time. People are always going to claim doom in their current time.
No matter how fucked everything is in the world right now, we are, on average, still significantly better off than almost every other human in all of existence.
But the trend line is definitely going in the wrong direction. We are past our peak.
For our lifetime maybe, but on a larger scale that is relevant to humanity as a species the trend down isn't even visible.
Again not trying to mitigate human suffering today, but I do really take issue with people dooming all the time.
What are your thoughts on climate change and increase in environmental toxins (e.g. PFAS and microplastics)? I don't see a positive light at the end of the tunnel on this.
All bad things that humanity has caused and will likely continue to make worse. No sugar coating that. However humanity has a knack for survival, and we are capable of what is basically magic with modern day science.
I don't have a prediction for the future but I know when push comes to shove and we're forced to take action to survive we will find a way. How I wish we would take serious actions to correct the bad we are doing before that though.
Why? Most of the world living better than 20 years ago and way better than 50 years ago, so the trend looks positive.
I'd take 2005 over now
And that must mean that existence is suffering. Lol
xD agree on that point
So your saying that buying a house, which shows stability, maturity, and possibly protection, might make you more appealing to the opposite sex? Yeah that is definitely weird. Women that are looking to settle down definitely are not interest in that kind of nonsense.
It just doesn't sit right with me after being friendzoned just prior. Obviously buying a house makes me substantially more attractive yeah
But I don't want someone to love me because I have my shit together, I want them to love me for ME
Maybe she's a gold digger in this instance. Who's to know...
But for sure the idea of "me" changes over time. You're probably not who you were 20 years ago, or 10 years ago, or 5 years ago. And not wh you'll be in 10 years from now.
Relationship dynamics change. Things that are attractive change as we change. Maybe you see it as just the house as her reasoning, and maybe it is. But maybe your discounting other changes. Maybe you're taking better care of yourself. Maybe you smell better. Maybe you're showing more maturity elsewhere. Maybe youre in a better headspace with enough time after divorce. Maybe it's none of the above and something else just clicked and changed the way she saw you. Perception is fluid with how we feel about ourselves. Maybe she's moved on from something in her life. She's a complex set of neurons as well.
But, say "love me for me", when "me" changes all the time, and often the current me might not even like themselves (as is often the case for many of us) ignores the outward projections and subtleties that we all emit as signs of good partners and mates. were animals, if we want to attract mates we need to emit things that are worth being attracted to (and is more complex than just looks)
This is really well said. Thanks
Hear, hear.
I feel like if people are married they should be doing therapy before they hate eachother. Seems inevitable.
Therapy didn't save us either
Not anytime soon. Stop doomscrolling.
The world is probably not ending any time soon, have some faith in humanity. Watch this video why everything feels so frustrating : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1nYtX-NUsc&ab_channel=Kurzgesagt%E2%80%93InaNutshell
Oh the world definitely is ending (for most people, at least). Democracy is falling apart and we're at the very early stage of a huge (huge) mass-unemployment crisis by 2040.
Okay then, think of it this way: we’ll all have plenty of time to scavenge for stylish leather outfits and practice our dramatic wasteland speeches. Silver linings, right?
amen brother