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Do some guys start humming/making noise around women to not frighten them? (lemmy.world)

submitted 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) by taxiiiii@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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Might sound silly, but every once in a while, random guys around me (pretty short, female) start humming/making random noises when they get near me, usually when I'm alone. Imagine me standing at a red traffic light at night or something. It's never women. Sometimes, it's some creep trying to get my attention, though that's usually kinda obvious.

But I also had it happen with guys who didn't seem like they wanted anything. I lowkey suspect that some might make noises so that I'm not caught off guard or something?

Any men on here who do this? Or am I just tripping?

Edit to summarize: So, a few guys apparently do it on purpose, while others think they might do it subconsciously. Some do it around women, others around whomever, since anyone can get scared. Super interesting.

Also, when I spoke of creeps, I meant actual assholes who did and said shitty stuff, not random socially awkward people. You know the drill.

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[–] vk6flab@lemmy.radio 20 points 4 days ago (3 children)

I'm physically quite large, but most people will outrun me for medical reasons, but you can't tell just by looking at me. It wasn't until #metoo that I considered what it might be like to walk on the street and be afraid for your safety all the time.

My partner shared a few historic experiences which made me want to throw up.

I've read the responses here so far and I've done similar things for the same reasons, noise, humming, nodding, etc.. I'll also cross the road if I think my presence might make someone feel uncomfortable, or if I feel uncomfortable.

I have also walked off a footpath onto the verge to give the person coming towards me, space to move.

I'd be interested to hear what that feels like for people who are experiencing this kind of interaction.

[–] KittenBiscuits@lemm.ee 5 points 4 days ago

It's appreciated! I don't expect men to cross to the other side of the street, but some little noise to signal your friendly or neutral approach helps.

I'm an avg size woman and I had to consciously make noise to not give my mom jump scares. I guess I am a naturally quiet walker.

[–] taxiiiii@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Guyfriends told me before that they do the crossing the street thing. Or walking a bit faster at night to get past me. I noticed people do that sometimes. Never noticed the former (which might mean it just works) and I very much appreciate the latter.

Just happy that more and more people develop some awareness for this stuff.

As for the humming: it certainly helps prevent jump scares I guess. Since some assholes also whistled or hummed at me before, only to try and get my attention, I'll still very much ignore men who do that, just in case.

Knowing the reason, I'll recognize and appreciate the gesture as a nice one in the future though.

[–] MrsDoyle@sh.itjust.works 2 points 3 days ago

Crossing the street is a thoughtful thing to do, and I for one appreciate it.