Oh, I definitely have self hosted services that affect daily life. I don't like when I'm not at home w/ pihole. I love paperless and mealie. Plex allowed me to move my DVD changers (400 each) to smart TVs and/or Fire Sticks which provide so much more in service. Every single user in the house can watch different content. It also allows recording of live content for later viewing. In the previous configuration, I never would have considered OTA content. I also have a service that backs up my Google Photos. I don't usually think about my NVR as a service but I don't want outsiders tempted to watch my cameras, even if I don't point them inside the house. Home Assistant has changed so much of my life and it'd be so much less without Node Red and VS Code Server.
I have to say, I do IT for a living so I go to great lengths to not turn my home systems into a second job. I have undone several systems over the years that just required too much work with much less value in return. Typically, I spend 10-15 minutes a week doing what I call "Care and Feeding" of my systems. Normally, this would be just updating dockers and VMs. I may add work to my schedule when my notes from the previous week suggest that I investigate a new service. I will stand it up and play around with it to see if I can get it to work in a fashion I like and is useable.
I would love to see a self-hosted VDE solution. We have a ton of VM options so I'd like to see the next logical step.