Sounds like habitat restoration to me ๐
doogiebug
joined 1 year ago
Yep, I just spent months agonizing over choosing a school program. I think our bodies tell us what we need if we listen. I was set on the "safe" choice, but as the registration deadline got closer I got more and more depressed and wasn't sure why. I came home one day and just collapsed on my bed and started sobbing because it didn't feel like "me" and I couldn't see myself being happy doing that for the rest of my life. But I didn't even realize how much I didn't want to do the program until it got so bad I couldn't control my emotions. I was trying really hard to force myself to be excited about the safe route but I just couldn't do it. I think our bodies tell us what we need. I was ignoring the twist in the pit of my stomach, ignoring how drained I felt learning the subject, ignoring the subconscious procrastination and lack of focus. I switched my program to what I really wanted to do and p much immediately felt relief. I feel aligned with myself, excited to start classes, feeling good about the job prospects and the types of people I'll get to be around. I literally feel lighter.
Some other people have made really good comments and suggestions about how to figure out what your gut is telling you. It's a bit morbid, but I like to pretend I'm old and on my death bed looking back at my life. How would I feel about the decisions I'm making right now? Will I regret not going for the harder thing I want more? Will I be happy to take the safe route? Did I waste my precious time that's now ending? Etc etc
oooo I should try a fig tree too. I didn't even know that dwarf citrus was even a thing but I def need to look into them more.
I've been lucky enough to avoid physical limitations so far, but I've done a lot of long-term travelling. Are you craving a bike tour specifically, or is part of it wanting to be nomadic/outside/survival mode for awhile? You can always go rubber tramping/dirtbagging with a vehicle, stay at campgrounds and bring a bike with you to go for shorter rides. Hell if you can walk decent and wanna get real rugged, there's always hitchhiking. I've met plenty of haggard old men with injuries and lives full of manual labor and drug abuse who are still getting around. There's a million ways to travel.
I love Mad Max: Fury Road. All of the visual storytelling, the world building through costume and vehicle designs, the shot compositions, the colors, the movements, the pacing, the fight choreography, it's all just chefs kiss. I love the whole post-apocalpyse genre a lot but the worldbuilding in Fury Road is so layered and complex yet subtle. I notice new things every time I watch it.
Aw man, sorry you're going through that. It sounds like you both just really need some space to calm down and process. I also get very snappy/aggro and tend to start fights when I'm anxious. I've pushed my partner away during health scares as well (I'm in therapy and always apologize after tho) When I do, it's never actually about my partner. It's me feeling anxious, wanting space, feeling guilty about receiving help and wanting to pull away and isolate to deal with my emotions. Don't take it personally and it's perfectly normal to snap back at someone when they're being a bit of an ass. You didn't do anything wrong. Hopefully your partner just needs some space to calm down.
Also, when you're both in a good headspace, it may be helpful to ask about why they want their mom to help them instead. He might be subconsciously guilty and not wanting to burden you.