this post was submitted on 05 Apr 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] Infinite@lemmy.zip 44 points 2 days ago (1 children)

If she went to someone's home for surgery, she was already brain dead.

(Apologies for making light of this tragedy, but dark humor is required to make this world bearable)

[–] dev_null@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 day ago

We won't know how it looked, maybe the "home" looked like a normal clinic.

[–] Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org 46 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

I don't see how the Onion would post that tbh 😅

[–] jerkface@lemmy.ca 23 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

This is the curse of every nottheonion. The general public (or you might say, regular joes) are incapable of discerning what is oniony and it always turns into Chuck Shepherd's News Of The Weird. https://shepherdexpress.com/puzzles/news-of-the-weird

[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 28 points 2 days ago (2 children)

during a botched cosmetic surgery at his New York City home

I don't understand why someone would opt into surgery at a house.

[–] HereIAm@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

That's something that bothers me in the UK. Many businesses are ran out of terrace houses. Especially dentists. They can look alright on the inside, but it really gave me the ick when looking for one and only seeing a dingy row of houses on google maps.

[–] uranibaba@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

I can only imagine she was offered a low price.

[–] Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] ChaosCoati@midwest.social 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world 14 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I see our patient is suffering from Tinybuttitus but don't worry! My treatment will help you take your mind off of it completely!

[–] Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 2 days ago

Get out of here with those quack diagnosis Dr McStuffins, if you even are a doc.

[–] jerkface@lemmy.ca 20 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] RegularJoe@lemmy.world 11 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

A botched BUTT implant leading to a BRAIN-dead state isn't oniony? Yeah, I get the lidocaine caused cardiac arrest which lead to her being brain-dead, but my first reaction was "how do you work on someone's butt and leave them brain-dead?"

[–] jerkface@lemmy.ca 30 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

No. It isn't. Being funny or surprising doesn't make an article oniony. The Onion isn't any kind of humour, it's specifically satire. A nottheonion article is one that appears to be satire, but isn't. There is no illusory subtext to this article, so it isn't oniony.

[–] deur@feddit.nl 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

It... is so easy to kill someone with the tools doctors use to do even minimally invasive procedure. The Human body is one whole machine working hard to maintain homeostasis. Theres a reason for the arduous medical schooling and fellowship.

Lidocaine aifaik depresses heartrates at high doses presumably with some kind of intravenous/intramuscular delivery as well. I'm no doctor but they probably cant remove or render the lidocaine inert fast enough to administer drugs to get your heart to beat itself again. Human bodies heal themselves, Doctors can only try to intervene and give your body a chance. Once their heart stopped, their fate was sealed as the potential for another heartbeat hit 0 when the lidocaine stopped it.

Another notable cause of death in butt related cosmetic surgery is fat injection, a BBL. If you accidentally inject fat into an artery the person just kinda dies.

[–] medicsofanarchy@lemmy.world 13 points 2 days ago

So what I'm hearing is if he did a brain implant, you would end up butt dead? Because there are a lot of people who could use a brain implant and who cares about their butts.

[–] APassenger@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago

What an ass.

[–] Orangutanion@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

She was trying to remove the butt lifts