"Denmark made clear that they absolutely have eggs", said a news person in German. Which is absolutely funny, because eggs and balls is the same word here.
"Dänemark hat klar gemacht, dass sie durchaus Eier haben."
this post was submitted on 14 Mar 2025
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They’ve asked us in Norway as well, and we said lol no
Based
Denmark? The same Denmark they are threatening over Greenland? That Denmark?
I get they are asking all of Europe (also the same Europe they are threatening a trade war with) but this is just full on clown car.
As an American, I’m here to warn you that this orange hemorrhoid will go back on any and everything he says and you should not, under any circumstance, believe or trust him. He will take the first opportunity to back out or screw you over. Don’t do it. Remember, him and president musk believ that Americans are willing to tolerate a little pain. Make them reap their own whirlwind and suffer the consequences. Fuck them. Sincerely. And twice on their holy day.
Denmark better fucking not.
I'm in the US. Put the fucking pressure on us. Buy literally anything else but American products. Our conservatives need to learn exactly how bad "America First" is, and you can't do that when you sell out.
It kind of depends on how long the American shortage goes for. If they can't get their supply chains in order for a year or so, making a deal could later prove good leverage material against the Americans. Get them hooked on cheap European eggs, then threaten to tariff them or cut off the supply, making prices soar all across the USA.
Sorry but Trump said recently that Europe has been created to piss off the USA. Since he knows better and since they consider it’s ok to have millions of chickens shitting on each other in their industries, we should let that great president handle that crisis himself. And keep our stock of eggs so that the price do not increase here. He can ask his friend Putin for cheap eggs.
NO THERE WILL BE NO LEVERAGE GAINED. YOU DONT KNOW HOW TRUMP OPPERATES. They will not honor ANY agreements or deal. LET US STARVE.
as an american, we're dying right now. don't gamble this long term shit. we need immediate consequences to fascism. you undermine the sane with these gambits
The washing egg thing would be pointless due to European chickens being vaccinated
Note that the US will consider the eggs only as payment for not having annexed Greenland in the past, and in no way as guarantee against future annexation.
From the Danish media: https://nyheder.tv2.dk/business/2025-03-14-usa-beder-danmark-om-hjaelp
There are a few additional points
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Multiple European countries have gotten similar requests, not just Denmark
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American egg policy requires washing the eggs while European policy prohibits this, making it highly inconvenient.
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They would want assurance that America won't suddenly put tariffs on the eggs.
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If america were to pay upwards of 1€ per egg, maybe they'd have a deal.
Egg Crisis is the name of my prog-rock band.
sure €10 or $100 per egg.
Or... (and this is always an option) Go fuck yourself.
i'ld happily send some (like 8 or so) eggs to the us, but...
- if you order now it will be the best deal ever, no one had ever made such a good deal, i'ld say its the best deal of the world, they'll ask how could you make such a good ... you get it.
- delivery will start roughly within a few congress days, but go fuck yourself, if not.
- just for the price of some scrap metal in the us, so 100.000$ each (not the package, each) see usd currency is currently dropping for reasons, so we must take care you're not ripping us off.
- the money needs to arrive within 2 ~~business~~calendar days (not congress days) from now, later arrival results in 25% fee per day over that time, fee will be cut off from each egg separately before packaging. good luck with european banking standards on a weekend
- no special packaging will be used and neither way no garantee for anything, we only garantee that a shipping label will be created, delivery guy -if at all- only has to pretend to have ringed the doorbell even if he was on another continent at that time. also no garantee for freshness of the product should it arrive at all. delivery guy also can choose to deliver to your neighbour instead (but we'll tell him that those cut-in-half eggs should better not go to canada nor mexico, they don't deserve such)
- if you change your mind and want to return the eggs, you'll have to send the very same eggs back, even when just a handfull of worthless screws were in the package when it arrived. go f yourself and fuck amazon too, they like to f with everyone, so just do it.
- we might decide to send spider or locust eggs instead of those from chickens, you didn't declare that exactly anyway, just ask amazon about slight product changes when clicking the "into shopping card" button, yes, we do adopt us-american style of business extra for doing business with the us.
- we do have the very same eggs for a smaller price somewhere, but this offer is just placed on top of the search by sellers choice, so its your fault if you use this offer (try use amazons order by price, cheap first and see what offers cease to exist for that search then)
- ah i nearly forgot, this order is a monthly abo by default.
- the money will be partly used to free chickens from slavery, this is our duty when dealing with pro slavery nations.
- this is not our chicken and egg problem
UPDATE: fixed business days to calendar days (thanks @psud)
Fix business days to calendar days and it'll be about good
"Give me eggs and Grønland please"
Go to russia for your eggs and leave Denmark alone.
Don't be a traitor Denmark...
First Greenland. Now the eggs. Shameless 🤭
Greenland, eggs, then ham.
How do you say 'Get fucked' in Danish?
Oh we have many to choose from.
- "skrid ad helvede til" = go to hell
- "fuck af" = fuck off
- "Må din røv klø og dine arme være for korte" = I hope your ass is itching and your arms too short to reach
- "Rend mig i røven" = Kiss my ass (literally: run me in the ass)
- "Rend og hop" = run and jump (for me)
- "Sut den" = Suck it
- "Luk røven" = Shut the fuck up (literally: close your ass)
hope your arse is itching and your arms are too short to scratch it
We should adopt that one in English, we don't have enough good curses
I'll still buy US eggs, even if there's imports. The market will balance itself out when we can raise chickens again.
Yes, let's expose as many people as possible to bird flu.
How long does freight take against the shelf life of an eggywegg?
I know these won't be bleached so they'll last a little longer than US eggyweggs.
If you refrigerate unwashed European eggs, they will last multiple months (I have kept eggs for more then 2 months), way past the expiration date on the packaging (I know because I do it constantly).