Two broken arms
this post was submitted on 19 Sep 2023
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Asklemmy
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Idk if it was only released online but... 'drrrr......drrrrrr....drrr...'
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Buttered bread-cat array.
Sadly, the original is lost to time, way back in the dial-up internet era. It was originally on the Darwin awards forum. It went on for pages and pages, all written in properly and formally. It was glorious.
The basic premise was 2 fold. 1. Buttered bread always lands butter side down. 2. Cats always land on their feet. Assume both of these as absolute facts. What would happen if you strapped a piece of buttered bread, butter side up, to the back of a car?
Incidentally, if anyone knows of a copy of the original, I would love to read through it again.
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The one I wish I could forget is the Clarissa comic about the little girl that is being horribly sexually abused by her father and everyone around her either knows and pretends that they don't, or just refuses to see the truth.
Jolly Ranchers
Double dick dude, evnr though it was fake, I remember the initial post and it was awesome.
Two broken arms is a classic and was actually real
The swamps of dagobah is always good for some gagging
Then the jolly ranger story really gets me to vomit
I wonder, in a few years, what will Lemmy's stories be.
The poop post and your advertisement campaign stopped by a strike have to be there
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For me it'd be Don't Even Reply: E-Mails from an Asshole.
Bunch of funny ones. Like someone offered a ride in a Prius for a long car trip between cities, he said he'd have to stop at a river to pour out some motor oil because he doesn't support the environment and had to make up for the environmental damage the Prius wasn't doing.
Waffle stomp
I can think of a few. Jenny, Kevin, non zero guy, and Iranian yogurt.
Does it have to be a true story? I love the story about the grandma who knitted a jumper or something for her grand son and accidentally summoned a demon. But she didn't understand and thought it was her grandson and he -the demon- just hung around an ate sandwiches and kept her company.
The adventures of Todd and Granny it's called.
The cumconut