Yesterday, I created my account on Lemmy.ml because I want to become mod on !stardewvalley@lemmy.ml. And I posted this comic on !stardewvalley@lemmy.ml It's SDV game cutscene where Shane a NPC go watch Sports game with you kiss you accidentily but It was part of that event also player kiss Shane(NPC) back. Here's video for more context. And someone claimed it have SA(Sexual Assualt) From Hexbear Ofcourse. So, I should delete it. I said it was a part of game cutscene. And If main player doesn't love the Shane(NPC) then they don't need to complete this event. And Just as a sarcasm I added Yeah we shoule delete this entire community because this game is Woke like Woke Detector Steam Group said. That user think I am some anti-woke dickhead something like that IDK. And tell me to Kill My Self. What I do now? I wanted on become mod on .ml because community was already well established. I message dessaline but I am sure he will not unbanned me. :(

Did I really did something wrong? I don't know If I really did something wrong.

Link for that comic if embed doesn't work.

Comic

Created one one lemm.ee !stardewvalley@lemm.ee

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[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 2 points 1 hour ago

Doesn't seem to me like you did anything serious enough to be banned from a whole platform, but moderators and administrators are individuals and some of them can't be objective when something presses their person hot buttons. If a right-wing Christian claimed abortion was Sexual Assault, that obviously would not automatically make abortion an off-limits topic, but I can imagine a moderator thinking differently. I agree with your response that nobody was being forced into anything, but using loaded words like "woke" is a good way to get yourself labeled by someone who thinks in memes.

[–] Blaze@feddit.org 13 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Probably more fit for !yepowertrippinbastards@lemmy.dbzer0.com , not sure this post will stay here

[–] Draconic_NEO@lemmy.world 5 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

I think it's largely fine for this community but a crosspost to that community would also be a good idea.

CC: @sag@lemm.ee

[–] sag@lemm.ee 4 points 1 hour ago

[–] FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 12 points 9 hours ago

Give yourself a high five (ok, fine, I guess that's just clapping, whatever) and move to a better instance!

[–] april@lemmy.world 41 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Make your own community on an instance that's not full of assholes

[–] Soluna@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 12 hours ago (7 children)

Why is lemmy.ml full of assholes? Wasn't that one of the original lemmy instances? Genuinely asking

[–] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 8 minutes ago

Lemmy was created by and for assholes, but a few other people have found it too.

[–] barsquid@lemmy.world 8 points 9 hours ago

It's because if you aren't participating in the groupthink delusions you will be banned by extremely fragile mods. So people who aren't assholes tend to leave.

[–] Blaze@feddit.org 6 points 8 hours ago

https://lemmy.world/post/16211417

[–] april@lemmy.world 21 points 12 hours ago* (last edited 9 hours ago) (1 children)

As far as I know it was started by the original lemmy developers which made the software because they felt persecuted for their beliefs on normie social media. Lemmy just happened to be around when the reddit CEO decided to f up reddit so everyone started using it despite the creators not being well adjusted people.

Edit: just so I'm not misinforming here's what they said themselves about the origin https://lemmy.ml/post/70319

I don't get how extremist leftist content ends up attracting people who are against woke stuff in stardew really but over time I've gotten the vibe the ml and hexbear people are in general more combative and angry about things.

[+] Soluna@lemmy.blahaj.zone -6 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Oh.

They're libertarians aren't they.

[–] Kierunkowy74@piefed.social 27 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

They are actually tankies

[–] Soluna@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

...huh. I didn't see that coming.

Honestly better left wing than right wing I think, even if they're stance on the wing is... questionable, to say the least. Though I say that with the benefit of hindsight.

I'm not proud of it, but long ago I myself fell into some of those spaces actually. And not to get into all of it now but I can absolutely see what leads one to have those perspectives, and I also think to some extent I am uniquely qualified to challenge those perspectives becaus, and ofc this doesn't go for everyone, but for many I've associated with the hardline posturing comes more from a defensive paranoia perspective than any will to opress or subjugate anyone. That was certainly always true for me, I'm trans ffs, I never wanted to opress anyone. But the opinion you'll run into at the heart of the authoritative left wing is that control is necessary to secure freedoms and prevent the new society from collapsing from outside influence. If you can challenge that core assumption (and also misinfo about Soviet Union etc. but that's a whole other topic), you can actually make meaningful dialouge.

But by far the thing that kept me in those communities for the longest time was the sense that anyone on the outside would not accept us for our beliefs and could not be trusted, and when all my friends and social connections were in those spaces it was in my interest not to deviate from the line, leading to a kind of spiraling of radical opinions in an echochamber. The thing that brought me out of it was an anarchist extending her hand and us just getting along well on a fundamental level, and not judging me for the beliefs that I'd fallen into or calling me stupid or anything else but just challenging them on an intellectual basis and having evidence to back up her arguments.

I suppose the best takeaway from all of this is that if any time you push someone away, you simultaneously push them closer towards the group that is influencing them. And I get it, sometimes it really isn't worth the energy to deradicalize people, especially those who are truly fargone. But I think it'd be a mistake to ostracize everyone from the outset.

Sorry for the long response, I got a lot more vulnerable here than I was really planning on 😅

Thanks for listening to my ted talk lmaoo

[–] hendrik@palaver.p3x.de 7 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago)

You're probably fine?! We all make mistakes and/or do silly things. It's part of the journey. And for example being a bigot isn't something to be proud of. But having the personal strength to get out of a situation like that, certainly is something to be proud of.

[–] JubilantJaguar@lemmy.world 5 points 10 hours ago

The Ted talk on this would certainly interest people.

[–] Franconian_Nomad@feddit.org 17 points 12 hours ago

It was created by the Lemmy developers and is one of the original Lemmy instances. And while Lemmy itself is fantastic, unfortunately the developers are not. They are tankies, extreme authoritarian communists.

Other than their other instances lemmygrad and Hexbear, lemmy.ml tries to look more moderate and has many active and great communities. But if you post things they dislike, you might run into similar troubles like OP.

[–] Steve@communick.news 8 points 12 hours ago

It's the original instance, run by the main Lemmy creators.

[–] 1984@lemmy.today 0 points 12 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago) (1 children)

It was, but it has communists on it, which is annoying to most large instance owners. So much that they don't even federate with it.

[–] Draconic_NEO@lemmy.world 2 points 1 hour ago

*tankies and I think you're thinking of Hexbear, most instances these days do federate with Lemmy.ml, unfortunately.

[–] hendrik@palaver.p3x.de 15 points 11 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago)

Join lemm.ee and ignore lemmy.ml

[–] gigachad@sh.itjust.works 18 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Lemmy.ml is doomed. You were unlucky to pick the wrong instance. It's one of the downside of federated Lemmy that .ml is the oldest instance, leading to many cool communities being hosted there. The only way is to start that community on another instance that is not .ml or .world and staying patient.

Hexbear and lemnygrad are not even a choice.

[–] JubilantJaguar@lemmy.world 3 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

Seriously. When I learned that the "ml" stood for Marxism-Leninism I almost had second thoughts about leaving the R-site.

The ml TLD belongs to Mali BTW. A semi-failed African state which just kicked out the "imperialist" French soldiers it had previously invited to put down its jihadist insurgents, in order to replace them with Russian mercenaries generously sent by Putin. You can't make this stuff up.

[–] Draconic_NEO@lemmy.world 2 points 53 minutes ago

Didn't Mali order a recall of all ml domains a while back due to an incident where military emails being sent to .mil were accidentally sent to .ml domains instead.

[–] Sundial@lemm.ee 15 points 12 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago) (1 children)

Your community doesn't need to be isolated to a single instance. Your home instance, lemm.ee, can be used as one.

[–] drspod@lemmy.ml 10 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

*your

[–] Sundial@lemm.ee 8 points 11 hours ago

Edited lol, thanks.

[–] BonerMan@ani.social 8 points 12 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago)

Be happy that you lost nothing and gained less toxicity in your life, at best you make a account on a instance that either doesn't federate the .ml instances or one that is blocked by them (like mine) there is a pretty active gaming community on sh.itjust.works, and you can make your own community if you want to.

[–] sag@lemm.ee 10 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago) (2 children)

What do I do now? Sorry If this was not right community to post this. Bye Tommorow is my exam. I hope I don't fuck it up because of this.

[–] Blaze@feddit.org 7 points 8 hours ago

Good luck with the exam!

[–] anamethatisnt@lemmy.world 28 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Take a deep breath, make yourself a cup of tea and go through your notes for the exam. Ace the exam!
Then think about which lemmy server you want to start your new stardew valley community on and what your community rules should be.

[–] sag@lemm.ee 4 points 1 hour ago

Thanks, It went all right.

[–] Soluna@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 13 hours ago (3 children)

I have no advice for you but as someone relatively new to lemmy I'm trying to understand all this drama. It seems like hexbear is leftist which I thought was cool (full disclosure tho I've not checked it out at all), but this just seems... really extreme. That joke comment reply probably wasn't the best thing to say but it's crazy to me that you didn't even get any dialouge opened up or anything, just an outright ban? And it seems like the person who reported it had no frame of reference for Stardew. Sorry this happened :< Seems kind of knee-jerk on their behalf. I hope you can open a dialogue, clear things up and get your account back <3

[–] Deceptichum@quokk.au 1 points 31 minutes ago

Basically all of Lemmy is vaguely leftist. Ml and HexBear are tankie instances. Db0 or slrpnk are more anarchist.

[–] TORFdot0@lemmy.world 10 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

I think hexbear started from chapotraphouse refugees when it got banned from Reddit. So it’s leftist but with the toxic culture from that.

[–] Soluna@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 12 hours ago

I'm not myself familiar with that subreddit but that's interesting.

[–] mathemachristian@lemmy.ml 2 points 11 hours ago

Here is the thread: https://hexbear.net/post/3706906 .

[+] mathemachristian@lemmy.ml -12 points 11 hours ago (4 children)

If you're gonna post about me at least tag me coward.

Here's the thread for context. https://hexbear.net/post/3706906

And someone claimed it have SA(Sexual Assualt) From Hexbear Ofcourse.

Here's my claim boiled down:

Shane’s reaction betrays he acted without establishing consent, aka committed SA. There is no other reason for him to feel guilty and make excuses other than trying to soften any backlash his action might’ve caused. Even if there was explicit consent along the lines of “hold me tight and kiss me” he is unaware of it and decided to act regardless. Nothing can excuse this. This is textbook SA.

The framing of the comic makes an act of SA look cute and romantic.

You have posted a comic romanticizing r*pe.

When pointed out that this causes harm to real-life people you still tried to defend it and decided to do nothing to mitigate the harm to these people.

You were unable to say why it was ok to leave a post up despite it being able to cause harm to people with PTSD.

You kept enganging in disgusting SA apologetics "oh he's just a depressed alcoholic", "oh but she wanted it", "oh but why does she kiss him back"

I did not ask you to or insinuate that you should kill yourself. Complete lie.

My bad on not reading the "this game is woke lol" comment as sarcastic.

[–] sag@lemm.ee 2 points 1 hour ago

I don't care about anything else. But..

oh he's just a depressed alcoholic

I was just telling about his personallity.

[–] Chozo@fedia.io 12 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Weird that you would link to a thread where you tell somebody "I hope you die soon" as if it somehow defends your position. You're a shitty person; not only are you trivializing actual rape with this smoothbrained take, but you're being a bully to OP for absolutely no reason. You're not the good guy here.

[–] mathemachristian@lemmy.ml -3 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

nah fuck off, these kinds of posts do trigger SA related trauma and keeping them up after it has been pointed out how they cause harm is risking harm to others because ?? don't even know why OP was so adamant about defending this tbh

[–] Chozo@fedia.io 13 points 8 hours ago

Bruh. You said you wanted to shoot him. Do you know how triggering that is to people who have suffered actual gun violence? Or does triggering PTSD victims only matter when it's convenient to your own narrative?

Fuck you, dude. You're 100% in the wrong here.

[–] Cryophilia@lemmy.world 17 points 11 hours ago

If you call that rape, you need therapy and medication and have no business being in any position of authority. Disgusting. That whole thread is sad and disgusting. You should be ashamed of yourself for the damage you do to real sexual assault survivors by trivializing their experience.

[–] wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 11 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago) (1 children)

I did not ask you to or insinuate that you should kill yourself. Complete lie.

You stated multiple times that you wanted to shoot him because he used the excuse that "it's just a game". That's a thin distinction at best.

You also use a separate account for your normal posting than your admin account, which feels needlessly sneaky.

Look, taking down the post was right call, and removing him from the mod position for arguing about it too. But the rest of this?

Telling someone that you want to injure them, then going on a multiple paragraph rant that is more about dunking on someone and venting than actually trying to inform isn't a good look for an admin.

I can't read their full responses that you deleted, but what you quoted from them reads like the kind of scared "stop yelling at me I don't understand what I did wrong please don't hit me" responses I gave to my mother while she was busy giving me reasons for therapy.

Normal users can get away with this sort of aggressive behavior because they don't have a position of power, but you do. You are inherently setting the example of what you want from your users and it's not a good look from the outside.

Now let's see if this criticism gets me banned too... hope not.

[–] mathemachristian@lemmy.ml -3 points 10 hours ago

I'm not an admin of any instance don't know why you think I am.

You stated multiple times that you wanted to shoot him because he used the excuse that "it's just a game".

And that was just a comment.

going on a multiple paragraph rant that is more about dunking on someone and venting than actually trying to inform isn't a good look for an admin.

I wasn't dunking on him but trying to explain my viewpoints to him. I didn't make fun of him, I wasn't sarcastic or smug, I stated my opinion. Rather plainly and bluntly but there was no dunking involved.

I can't read their full responses that you deleted, but what you quoted from them reads like the kind of scared "stop yelling at me I don't understand what I did wrong please don't hit me" responses I gave to my mother while she was busy giving me reasons for therapy.

The quotes are pretty much entirely what was written. Which was SA apologia. My comments are nothing but trying to explain what was wrong. Also I didn't delete anything. I'm neither a mod nor an admin. I am just a normal user.