this post was submitted on 26 Aug 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] StrongHorseWeakNeigh@lemmy.world 154 points 2 months ago

That robber said, "Actually, I don't want that smoke." And left very promptly.

[–] slaacaa@lemmy.world 111 points 2 months ago

“Uhm. Meow?”

[–] Godric@lemmy.world 90 points 2 months ago

Every time I read this it about has me crying laughing, it's perfect

[–] Kyrgizion@lemmy.world 71 points 2 months ago

Based and dominance established. Carry on.

[–] MacStache@programming.dev 62 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I don't get it. How did the cat know how to open the door?

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 26 points 2 months ago (2 children)

How would a cat even know what a knitting needle was? Yarn is not for knitting in their world.

[–] MacStache@programming.dev 14 points 2 months ago

Maybe it was a knittycat? This post raises a lot of questions.

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

It's the thing they need to remove from the ball of yarn to use it as intended, otherwise it just doesn't roll right.

[–] Reddfugee42@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

Evolution, duh

[–] OsrsNeedsF2P@lemmy.ml 53 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] unreachable@lemmy.world 71 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] NegativeInf@lemmy.world 43 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Comment105@lemm.ee 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You've not heard of the bearded lady?

[–] NegativeInf@lemmy.world 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Oh, I have. I was just posting the gif of the rest of that video because the entire thing makes me die laughing every time. The tone of that old man's voice as he questions all of reality is truly something.

[–] Monument@lemmy.sdf.org 7 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I have not heard of anything you two funny kids are talking about.

… source?

[–] PM_Your_Nudes_Please@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (3 children)
[–] CeruleanRuin@lemmings.world 2 points 2 months ago

Well now I just have more questions.

[–] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 1 points 2 months ago

It's a clip from a mcjuggernuggets video lol

[–] Monument@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 2 months ago

It’s funny. I like it.

[–] funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Google daddy chill vine know your meme

[–] Monument@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 2 months ago

I spent some cool years on the internet being uncool, thinking I was too cool for internet shit.

(I mean, I was also deeply depressed, heavily traumatized, and unable to function beyond work and escapism for basically the entire period Vine existed.)

[–] Comment105@lemm.ee 1 points 2 months ago

I'm gonna screenshot this nonsense and send it to the White House in 60s at the height of the Cuban Missile Crisis.

They'd nuke Earth instantly, get Fallout IRL going.