this post was submitted on 10 Jun 2024
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Much easier for shoplifting, yeah. Just stick a knife in the bag and inconspicuously drain it into your fanny pack while pretending to browse other baking items. Walk on out and you've got 1.5 lb of that all-purpose grain glitter and no one is the wiser.
Flour is like the cheapest food you can buy, though? A whole day of cheese and jalapeno stuffed bread takes like $5 to make.
You can use it for gravel as well. I walked into a quarry recently and pretended to fall into a pile of loose gravel (but then I started covertly shoveling it into my fanny pack).
Boom. Close the zipper on that lock box while some production employees help you out of the gravel and you've secured 1/8500th of what you need for your new driveway. You just have to pull the grift a few more times.
They know my face at the local quarry now, though, which is problematic.
Yeah, but like, the jalapenos and cheese don't just fit in the fanny pack after all the flour is in there. It's rough getting by these days.
So you're the reason there's always at least one ripped bag.
Jesus, I hope I'm the only reason...